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Saturday, January 31, 2015

Blackhawks at Ducks 4-1 Win Recap

Duck Nasty

by Patrick Stankus

The Blackhawks annual Disney on Ice, Ice Show road trip continued Friday night with the Hawks paying a visit to Disneyland, or if you want to be specific, Anaheim. If you listened to last night's Puckin Hostile Shoutcast, you would have heard me claim several times, that I could see the Ducks drubbing the Hawks. Luckily for the Hawks, the complete opposite happened, as it was the Hawks who were the dominate team on the ice.

Heading into the game, the Blackhawks the pleasure of waiting for the Ducks in Anaheim, as the Ducks had played (if you want to say they did) in San Jose on Thursday night. As the game got underway, it was pretty clear that the Hawks had more energy, but it was the Ducks who were throwing their weight around. Despite the hitting, the Hawks managed to get the scoring started. Patrick Kane had an opportunity to shoot the puck, but made what could be argued the "one too many pass" to El Captain. El Captain made the most of the extra pass as he buried to give the Hawks the 1-0 lead after one.

The second period saw the Hawks continue to dominate, out shooting the Ducks 14-7. Duncan Keith recorded his 400th career point on his 7th goal of the season. Later in the period Patrick Kane added another tally, on a wicked wrist shot. Despite having three power plays in the period and being unable to cash in on any, the Hawks found themselves up 3-0 after two periods.

As the third period went on, the Ducks seemed to get more and more energy. This was evident as Corey Perry managed to strip the puck from Hossa in the neutral zone, glide a pass past a sprawling Brent Seabrook to Richard Rakell who put it home to cut the Hawks lead to 3-1. That however was as close as the Ducks would get. Patrick Sharp added his 4th assist of the night as he caused a turnover along the boards, and centered the puck to a wide open Patrick Kane, who redirect the puck in, to give the Hawks a 4-1 lead for good. Next up for the Hawks is a short flight up to Northern California and San Jose for a Saturday night tilt. Rumor has it, we might have a Gatekeeper sighting on the recap for that game, as he could be back from his vacation with Kim Johnsson to the Swedish cabin on top of the Globe Arena.

The Good
- Corey Crawford was excellent in net. He made several key saves to kill any momentum the Ducks tried to get going in the 2nd period.
- It was nice to hear Pat Foley point out what EVERYONE with hockey knowledge already knew. The Johnny Oduya/Michal Rozsival pairing is horrendous.
- Duncan Keith reached a milestone in his career as he recorded his 400th career point.
- Patrick Kane and Patrick Sharp had stellar performances. Kane had 2 goals, 1 assist, and a +4, while Sharp had 4 assists and was a +4.
- Speaking of Sharp, on his 4th assist, he had a great stick lift, that resulted in a turnover, and his centering pass to Kane was right on the mark.
- Who didn't enjoy watching Duncan Keith clown Corey Perry?

The Bad
- Brent Seabrook had a rough night, as in being pumled with hits. I guess the Ducks still haven't gotten over his "hit" or a I say it "Corey Perry falling into a hit" from a few years back.
- The powerless power play 0 for 3, which all three power plays came in the 2nd period, a time when the Hawks could have put the game away earlier.
- In keeping with the special teams, the Hawks managed to take two bad back to back 3rd period penalties, one of which saw the Ducks score on.

The Ugly
- We'll revert back to last night's shoutcast for the ugly. My prediction of the outcome of this game was as attractive as Buzz's girlfriend, wuff.
- The Ducks learned a valuable lesson these last two games, never let Bruce Boudreau coach on an empty stomach.


Friday, January 30, 2015

Puckin Hostile Shoutcast Number 20

In this Darren Kimble/Al Secord/ Mike Hudson 20th Episode of the Shoutcast, Gatekeeper and Pat get completely derailed several times as they add their thoughts on newest edition to the Puckin Hostile superfan club @harms_derek, the terrible All Star Game, a Blackhawks trade that happened while recording, adequate Rundblad, Gatekeeper's Florida trip, the Martin Brodeur retirement, Gorilla Salad suspension, live play by play of the Ducks getting their asses kicked by the Sharks, and much, much more.

For all your custom jersey needs visit Black and Tan Sports at:

Check out Mike Figueroa at:
Portions of his profits go to the Ronald McDonald House Chicago.

You can find the episode on iTunes by following this link: iTunes

Puckin Hostile Shoutcast - Episode 20 MP3 Download

You can listen below on the Talkshoe player:

Thursday, January 29, 2015

Blackhawks at Kings 4-3 Loss Recap

Kings Ransom

With the All Star break now behind, the Blackhawks continued their road trip in Los Angeles on Wednesday night with the start of their 6 game "Ice Show Trip." Much of the build up leading to the game was about how both teams have been disappointing to an extent. Calm down Blackhawks fans, I didn't say they suck, I said they're not up to most of your expectations. They're at mine. Anyways, since its late, lets get to the recap.

The Blackhawks came out with a lot of energy, and early on it payed off. No longer serviceable, but now Adequate Rundblad teed up a slap shot that was blocked, and the loose puck went right to a wide open Patrick Kane, who in turned fired the puck into a wide open net to give the Hawks the early lead. Just before the midway point of the period, Hawks killer Jeff Carter tied the game at one. Following a lazy Drew Doughty penalty, Patrick Kane threaded the needle with a cross ice pass to Patrick Sharp who buried it to give the Hawks a 2-1 lead, and that's where we stood after one.

Unlike the first period, the Hawks were not firing on all cylinders in the second period. Some sloppy play came back to bite them early. A soft, but correct holding call on Joakim Nordstrom gave the Kings an early power play and they didn't waste any time. Jeff Carter netted his second goal of the night to tie the game at two. The early Carter goal would prove to be the only goal of the period, as at the end of two, the game was tied at two. Oh shit, I'm starting to sound like Pat Foley.

The theme of the night seemed to be early goals, and the third period  was no different. Andrew Shaw continued his improved play of late, scoring the early goal, to put the Hawks up 3-2. Unfortunately for the Hawks, they unraveled as the period went on, and yielded two goals in just about three minutes, to give the Kings the 4-3 to start the six game road trip. Next up for the Hawks is the short drive to Anaheim on Friday night.

The Good

- Patrick Kane had a stellar night again, as he had a goal and an assist. The pass on Sharp's goal was one of the patented Kane passes.
-Corey Crawford had two HUGE saves in the 2nd period. One was on Dustin Brown following a failed clearing attempt by Brent Seabrook, and the other was a shorthanded, breakaway bid on Jeff Carter. Two big saves that kept the Hawks in the game.
- I'll give credit where credit is due. Yes, Teuvo had a nice zone entry that lead to Shaw's goal. Are you happy now? See I'm not always negative. Wait, spoke too soon I think.
- #AdequateRundblad, I had too.

The Bad

- Since it didn't cost the Hawks, I'll put it in the bad category, but the Delay of Game penalty on Seabrook was awful. We're supposed to be all about player safety now, but when the puck is under someone, lets just continue to let opposing players spear at the puck, instead of blowing the whistle. Secondly, from the position referee Gord Dwyer was in, he couldn't see if Seabrook had actually closed his hand on the puck. Whatever. Either way, I still don't think we should have instant replay of calls like this.

The Ugly

- Sounds like a broken record, but the pairing of Rozsival and Oduya has to end. Its playing with fire.
- Dustin Brown destroyed Rozsival with a hit in the first period, but unfortunately Rozsival got up and continued to play.
- Overall the entire defense was terrible. (I'll save this rant for the next shoutcast)
- Johnny Oduya, (-2) nothing more.
- Lost draw by Toews in the defensive zone, wound up costing the Hawks, as Muzzin scored after gathering the loose puck.
- On Toffoli's goal, Jeff Carter made some contact with Crawford, which immediately triggered the "goalie interference" bitching. As former goalie, I don't have  a problem with the no call, as Crawford was outside the crease. If Crawford was in the crease when the contact occurred, then its a different story.
- Three times the Hawks had the lead in this game, and you manage to blow it all three times. Nicely done.
- Can we lay off the hatred of Dustin Brown? Does everyone just hate him because he plays on the edge and with physicality? I know in Chicago those are something newer fans aren't used to seeing.


Monday, January 26, 2015

2015 NHL All Star Weekend Recap

Lazy Sunday

by Patrick Stankus

While half of Puckin' Hostile is partying it up in Florida, the NHL held its own party over the weekend in my favorite town, Columbus, Ohio. Yes, Lumbus of all places was the host city of the 2015 NHL All Star Game. Now, I'm not going to give you a "Good, Bad, and Ugly" recap here, frankly because that wasn't hockey that was played yesterday at Nationwide Arena. The All Star Game is what it is. To me, its a break from being a negative, picky, hockey fan always pointing out the bad and the turnovers that normally happen when Michal Rozsival is on the ice for the Blackhawks.

I will absolutely agree with anyone that yesterday's final score of 17-12 was absurd. As a former goalie, it was painful to watch. But again, the All Star Game is about having fun, and putting on a show for the fans. Speaking of those fans, who didn't enjoy the Lumbus fans booing Rick Nash? How the Nash saga ended wasn't all on Nash, it was more about the fact it was time to move on. For Columbus fans, they're still building their group who they love to hate. Rick Nash fits that category. He had fun with it, and that's how it should have been handled.

Speaking of Columbus fans, we all know they love that cannon they shoot off after a goal. Yours truly enjoys it as well, but there was a slobbering love affair going on with yesterday during the telecast, that even I couldn't take any longer. We get it NBCSN, its an awesome cannon, but we don't need to be told how you have to prepare for it. That's part of the fun of the cannon. Also, to all the players who were bitching and moaning about it, get over it. If you played in Columbus, you'd probably like hearing it. If you're an opposing player who hates the cannon, I have an idea for you. How about playing defense and stopping the Blue Jackets, then you won't have to hear it.

By far though, the best/coolest thing about yesterday's All Star Game was watching Darryl Sutter's son, Chris, coach Team Foligno. For all the crying about how bad the game was, if this didn't bring a smile to your face, then something is wrong with you. To me, this is what the All Star Game is all about, having fun. Kudos to Darryl Sutter for taking a break from being Coach Serious for the night, and allowing his son to have the time of his life. It was awesome to see. Stick tap salute to Chris and Darryl.

Other points of interest I took from All Star Weekend were;

- The music performances were awful. Especially the opening one by Locksley. It reiterates my opinion that live music sucks. 
- How could the ref miss the tripping call after Getzlaf went down in the 2nd period? (Its sarcasm folks)
- Dustin Byfuglien was a -5. You didn't think I'd let that pass did you?
- If we were playing "post" in the skills competition, Jonathan Toews would have won hands down.
- Speaking of the skills competition, the Tarasenko/Elliott selfie was a cool thing to see. Remember its about having fun people.
- 108.5 mph, Shea Weber has an absolute cannon of a shot. It would have been nice to see him battle Chara, but then again, I don't know how effective Chara would have been taking a slap shot with a walker in front of him.
- The fantasy draft turned out to be a bigger success than I thought it would be. The drunkeness that was going on reminded me of almost every fantasy football draft I've been apart of.
- Who didn't enjoy Drew Doughty's bald joke towards Kevin Shattenkirk? We need more comedic personalities like that.
- The Kessel for Seguin trade was a nice joke to the event, and nice to see Kessel have a sense of humor about it.
- We're not done with Kessel, hopefully he enjoyed looking at the ice girl as she walked by.
- And its safe to say Kathryn Tappen has replaced Erin Andrews as the hottest sideline/rinkside reporter in sports. (Sorry Jarret Stoll)

Now all the fun and games are over. The Blackhawks will continue their 7 game road trip with their 6 game "Ice Show" trip that opens up in Los Angeles on Wednesday.

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Blackhawks at Penguins
3-2 SO Win Recap

Sudden Death

by Patrick Stankus

Did you honestly expect anything less from me when the Blackhawks and Penguins meet in Pittsburgh? Of course I'm going to reference my favorite good/bad movie of all time. Its probably only going to get worse with the references, but I just wish the Blackhawks had a goaler that could kick that high in full equipment. 

If you were hoping for a Gatekeeper recap, I'm sorry, but he's getting the Antti Raanta treatment. You know he's sitting on the bench while Puckin' Hostile rides the hot hand. Okay, enjoy bullshit, onto the "Rivalry Night" matchup. Who knew you could have a rival who swept your ass in the '92 Finals, and then had to rely on a fire marshal in Game 7 of the '95 Finals to save your ass? I guess after all you can have a rival from a movie. Told you, it was going to get worse.

The Blackhawks picked up right where they left off the previous night against the Coyotes as David Rundblad, yes, Adequate Rundblad opened the scoring for the Hawks. However unlike last night when they faced an AHL team in Arizona, it was a much more evenly matched opening frame, and in the end the Hawks were up 1-0 on the Penguins after one.

The second period saw the Hawks increase their lead early on after Marian Hossa fired home a Power Play goal. Then the game went to hell in a hand basket pretty quickly. The Hawks managed to blow that two goal lead, following goals by Zach Sill (who?) and perennially dickbag Steve Downie. After two the game was tied at two. Fire up a bad Pat Foley tone there.

The highlight of the third period belonged to Corey Crawford. Well its not the highlight you're thinking of. As Crawford left the net to play the puck on a dump in, the puck took one of those crazy bounces, and wound up on the tape of David Perron. Luckily for Crawford, Seabrook pressured Perron, and Perron missed a wide open net. Crisis averted. After an evenly matched third period, that produced no scoring, we headed to sudden death. Yes, this shit writes itself sometimes.

After a scoreless overtime, the game headed to shootout. El Captain, and Kane scored for the Hawks, while Perron and Crosby went 0 for, and the Hawks skated away with a 3-2 shootout win. Thank you for not counting on Jean-Claude Van Damme to save the day this time.

The Good

- Rundblad now adequate instead of serviceable
-  With all the line blending that goes on, the Hossa - Toews - Saad line is very strong, and one that should not be blended anytime soon.
- Speaking of Hossa, wasn't it nice to have a sighting of him again?
- Crawford was big net for the Hawks, recording 33 saves.
- It was nice to see the Hawks play a clean game against a legitimate NHL opponent.

The Bad

- Two times in the 1st period the clock stopped working. I speak for everyone when I say, fix your clock Pittsburgh.
- As much as we enjoyed seeing Downie take a stick to the chops, I'm still in awe that it was by way of a Crawford high stick. At least he bailed himself out on the penalty kill.
- Again, I have to repeat myself to all goalies. STAY IN THE NET. Once again a bad bounce just about cost the Blackhawks the game. Someone please inform Crawford that he does have defenseman to play the puck.

The Ugly

- Michal Rozsival had a very nice Michal Rozsival type of night. He was on the ice for both of the Penguins 2nd period goals. On the second goal he managed to let Downie beat him to front of net, and since we like to live in the past, it reminded me of how Chara let Bickell beat him to front of net in game 6. Brutal, just brutal. Easily the worst contract on the Blackhawks.
- Continuing with Rozsival, the Oduya-Rozsival pairing is hot vomit in a garbage bag. How this pairing has stayed intact is beyond me.
- Oh the coaching of Q showed again why I don't think its a good idea for Teuvo to learn on the fly. Turbo got a team low of 8:26 of ice time.
- In the battle of the "worst announcer for a Blackhawks/Penguins game" I'll give the award to Pierre McGuire, only because we at least got a "Holy Shit" out of Paul Steigerwald.


Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Blackhawks vs. Coyotes 6-1 Win Recap

Dr. Feelgood

by Patrick Stankus

Coming off of bad back to back home losses, the Blackhawks got just what they needed when the Phoenix, sorry, forgot we had to change the name to broaden the fan base, Arizona Coyotes visited The UC. Actually after the shellacking that took place, you can argue the Coyotes didn't even show up.

The Hawks came out flying, clowning the Coyotes and outshooting them 20-9 in the first. El Captain got things started for the Hawks, snapping out of his goal drought just under seven minutes in. The next line will stun you. We had an Andrew Shaw sighting. Yes, after his benching in Sunday night's game, Shaw got on the board after a sweet dish from Turbo. I know I'm stunned at what I just wrote too! After one, the Hawks had the lead 2-0.

From then on, things only got worse for the Coyotes. Goals by Kane and Turbo, opened the game up to 4-0 before the Coyotes were finally able to get on the board. But whatever hope the Coyotes had from that goal was short lived as Mike Smith allowed a soft serve-esk goal to Andrew Shaw late in the second period to give the Hawks a 5-1 lead after two.

Smith drew the short straw tonight, and stayed in the net the entire game. As if allowing goals to Shaw (2), Kane, slump breaking Toews, and Turbo, wasn't bad enough, the sixth goal was yielded to none other than David Rundblad. Ouch. Talk about taking it on the chin. How's that contract extension working for you? It makes Crawford's deal tolerable. So in other words, the Hawks blew out the soon to be either Las Vegas, Seattle, Portland, Kansas City, Houston, or Quebec City Coyotes 6-1. Next up for the Hawks is a trip to Pittsburgh before the All Star break.

The Good
- One game after his awful showing this past weekend, Andrew Shaw bounced back nicely. I'll give him credit for rebounding nicely, and perhaps my assumption of he "sucks" after Sunday's game was a bit harsh, but I'm still not going to anoint him cured. I want to see more consistency.
- Patrick Kane's goal, was his 200th of his career. My how time flies.
- Aside from yielding one goal to the Coyotes, Antti Raanta was solid in net. It cannot be stated enough how difficult it is to be thrown into a game after sporadically playing.
- 51 shots, 6 goals. I don't care who the opponent is, I'll take it.
- Despite being 1 of 5 on the power play, the Hawks were skating circles on the Coyotes on the power play in the second period. Even though they didn't score on it, its a step in the right direction.
- David Rundblad looked comfortable out there night, not just because he scored either. Perhaps the key to this is him playing on the right side finally.
- Credit to Turbo on his goal. He took a high shot on Smith, and didn't stop skating. He followed up his shot, and put home the rebound. Looks like the kid is learning on the fly. But somehow he didn't crack 10 minutes of ice time.

The Bad
- Is there anyone surprised that it was the defense pair of Oduya and Rozsival that was on the ice for the Coyotes loan goal?
- Its starting to get a little concerning, but what's wrong with Marian Hossa?

The Ugly
- For the sake of not leaving this area blank, I'll pick something. Its hard to pick something about the Hawks, so I'll go with this; Mike Smith.


Sunday, January 18, 2015

Blackhawks vs. Stars 6-3 Loss Recap

                      Back To Back Misery

Stop me if you've heard this before. The Blackhawks were playing a team that was on a back to back playing in Dallas the night before. Unlike Friday night, where Winnipeg visited the UC, tonight, the Dallas Stars were paying a visit. Oh and it was a joyous one as well.

The first period could have easily been one of the worst periods of hockey I've seen played by both teams. Five goals total, three penalties, 34 total shots, a shorthanded goal, and a power play goal. Got all that? Good, because after all that the Blackhawks trailed the team that played 22 hours the night before 3-2 after one.

Things changed in the second period. I don't know how many f-bombs Q dropped during the intermission, but it seemed to work......for at least the second period. The Blackhawks dominated play, outshooting the Stars, 16-6. Brandon Saad added his second of the game, and after two we were tied at three.

Remember how I said Q's speech worked for at least the second period? Well just look at the complete shitshow that took place in the third period. The Stars completely out played the Blackhawks and looked like the team that hadn't played the night before. The Stars rang up 3 goals in the third en route to their 6-3, lets call it what it was, ass kicking on the Blackhawks home ice.

The Good
- Its pretty sad that the Blackhawks have to rely on the NHL to make the obvious line changes for them. I present the case of Gorilla Salad who will have a hearing for his cross check from Friday night. With Gorilla Salad out of the line up Joakim Nordstrom found his way back into the line up. Its about damn time. Hopefully this is the end of Gorilla Salad in Chicago.
- Despite being a -1, I'll give Saad a tip of the cap. He at least did look like he gave a shit tonight.

The Bad
- Yes, Patrick Sharp held his own with his fight with Shawn Horcoff, but who the fuck cares that it was his first fight in 6 years? Give me a break.
- Its becoming quite clear that the worst contract on the Blackhawks is that of Michal Rozsival. $2.2 million  to be a pylon. 

The Ugly
- Back to Gorilla Salad, I like how the Blackhawks are trying to cover his ass for that cheap shot, by saying he now has a knee injury. If that's true, I hope its from a fellow teammate, who like any normal fan, has had enough of his shit, and realizes there's other capable players of taking that roster spot.
- The defense the Blackhawks have been playing of late is beyond atrocious. See, well look at any goal you want really.
- The Stars first goal was a nice clusterfuck courtesy of the Blackhawks. Lost defensive zone by Kruger, Nordstrom can't handle the lose puck, and Shaw does a fly by. Two thumbs up there.
- Speaking of Shaw. He sucks, period. Can we all get over the bloody face picture of him hoisting the Stanley Cup? Andrew Shaw is nothing more than an average 4th line player at best. Oh, he was also a -3 tonight.
-  Tim Erixon made a brief appearance to the line up, and I mean brief. 7:28 to be exact.
- Dallas blocked 20 shots tonight. Just keep shooting pucks into the opponents shin pads by all means. I bet Chinese knockoff jersey guy is still screaming shoot right now.
- ENOUGH OF THE FUCKING FORWARDS PLAYING THE POINT ON THE POWER PLAY. Does the line blender not work for special teams?
- And with this loss, the Blackhawks now find themselves just two points away from falling into a Wild Card spot. As we speak Winnipeg is leading, so all you Johnny Positive fans can take off your positivity glasses and look at the problems the Blackhawks have.


Saturday, January 17, 2015

Blackhawks vs. Jets 4-2 Loss Recap

Night Of Horrors

by Patrick Stankus

I first want to apologize to everyone who was hoping for a drunk recap. Unfortunately, I decided to be the designated blogger for tonight's game, and well, we'll see how that turns out.....

Friday night's game against the Winnipeg Jets had all the makings of being a trap game for the Blackhawks. Whether it was the 4 days off since their last game, Winnipeg playing in Dallas the previous night, or the fact that the Puckin' Hostile crew was in attendance, the bottom line is the trap game proved to be all of the above.

The joke was on the Puckin' Hostile crew as Quenneville right from the drop of the puck decided he wanted to fuck with us. Seriously, the line of Kruger, Smith, and Gorilla Salad starts? What. The. Fuck? I couldn't tell exactly from the 300 level, mainly because of Chinese knockoff jersey guy was standing, but it sure looked like Q was giving the PH crew the two fingered salute. Nicely done Q. By the way, how is that "enforcer" of Gorilla Salad working for ya? (More on that dipshit later)

Despite the asshattery of the "starting line," the Blackhawks managed to get on the board first, courtesy of a Brandon Saad backhander. Just after the midway point of the period, Winnipeg tied it up, after Andrew Shaw got scared of Andrew Ladd, and allowed Ladd to skate around the net, finding an open Zach Bogosian to fire the puck past Crawford. Nice work Shaw. Please someone explain how Shaw is anything more than a 4th line player? Because he isn't. The highlight of the period however (and game for me) was watching Bryan Bickell eat a half a dozen fists during his "scrap" with Anthony Peluso. Thank you Bickell, I desperately needed a good laugh.

After a scoreless, 2nd period (we'll get to the important 2nd period play later), the Jets took control of the game in the 3rd period. Goals by Bryan Little and Chris Thorburn 28 seconds apart, put the Jets up 3-1. However much to the bandwagon's delight, Teuvo Teravainen notched his first career NHL goal to give the Hawks some life. It was all for not, as Andrew Ladd added an empty netter, and the Jets left Chicago with a 4-2 win. Nice effort boys, after 4 days off.

The Good
- Just for Gatekeeper, Teuvo for the sake he scored, and I called it on the way to the game. Yes, I did barf after Teuvo scored, but it was also because that pylon of a defenseman Rozsival assisted on the goal. Talk about a kick to the balls.
- Speaking of Teuvo, after watching him in person, I can honestly say this is an accurate description of how he looks out there. (He's the bottom player in red.) Yes, when comparing him to fat asses like Byfuglien, this paints the picture perfectly.

The Bad
- Andrew Shaw sucks. Period. He is nothing more than an energy guy who takes horrible penalties at the worst time.
- The defensive coverage on the Jets 2nd and 3rd goals was putrid. I was going to use soft, but that would be an understatement.
- Brad Richards had a rough night. Not only was he a -2, but he was also replaced by Teuvo on the 2nd line.
- Positive : The Blackhawks scored 2 goals on Michael Hutchinson. Negative : The Blackhawks still lost.

The Ugly
- The best thing that can happen for the Blackhawks is for the NHL to do them a favor and suspend Gorilla Salad for his cheap, dirty cross check to Mathieu Perreault. There were multiple topics discussed on the way to the game between Gatekeeper and I, and two of the happened. 1, Teuvo scored. 2, Gorilla Salad did something fucking stupid.
- Again, how is Gorilla Salad on the ice instead of Nordstrom? Enough of this bullshit already. What is the point of dressing a has been of an enforcer for 7 minutes a game?
- Andrew Shaw's lazy holding penalty that led to Winnipeg's go ahead goal in the 3rd period.
- Anytime I have to see Dustin Byfuglien record 2 assists, that's enough to make you sick.
- The Blackhawks yielded three 3rd period goals, when you do that, you deserve to lose.
- The obliterated drunk, that we gave the nickname of Chinese Knockoff Jersey. Next time wait for a whistle to get up, and oh if you're going to drunk ramble and attempt to hit on a girl, pick one that doesn't have a giant rock on her finger.
- Don't worry fans, the PH crew won't be attending any games any time soon. Our record now "improves" to 1-2-2 on the year when one or in this case both of us are in attendance.


Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Puckin Hostile Shoutcast Episode 19

The year starts with the Denis Arkhipov Episode of the Shoutcast.

Gatekeeper and Pat cover latest news, thoughts on superfan @jakeprough,Stuart Scott, CapGeek.com, Corey Crawford Meatballery, The Winter Classic, Coaching change in TOR, possible coaching change in MIN, All-Star Jerseys and much, much more.

For all your custom jersey needs visit Black and Tan Sports at:

Check out Mike Figueroa at:
Portions of his profits go to the Ronald McDonald House Chicago.

You can find the episode on iTunes by following this link: iTunes

Puckin Hostile Shoutcast - Episode 19 MP3 Download

You can listen below on the Talkshoe player:


Sunday, January 11, 2015

Blackhawks vs. Wild
4-1 Win Recap

"Blackest Crow"

by Gatekeeper

The Blackhawks welcomed the Minnesota Wild into the United Center for their second meeting in four days. The Wild were still feeling the effects of the game in Minny-haha, and a thrashing by the Preds Saturday night.

You would not be able to guess based on the score, but the Blackhawks wee actually out shot for the first period 14-13. Some early sloppy play by the Wild had them in a very uncomfortable position (Not the back of a Volkswagon). A 2-0 lead, at home, going into the second period, is right were the Blackhawks should be.

In the opposite fashion of the first period, the Blackhawks started out a little slower but picked up the pace to out score the Wild 2-0 and out shoot them 14-12. $-0 heading into the third period, just how they drew it up.

The third period was just a mere formality, because it was clear that the Blackhawks had cemented a solid lead, and the Wild had given up. The only question was if the Blackhawks could maintain the shutout. As with most games Crawford plays in, it was not to be. Nonetheless, the Blackhawks came away with a win. A solid and convincing win.

The Good
  • Just over 4 minutes into the game and The Blackhawks were already up 1-0. The way the Hawks were swarming around the net, it was only a matter of time before they took the lead. The previous 3 shifts, the Hawks were buzzing the net. The combination of Saad, to Toews, to Hossa made it look easy.
  • Just a couple of minutes after the Hossa goal, the Richards/Bickell/Kane line pulled a similar play. Kane drew the goalie and a defender, which left Bickell wide open on the back door, and the first period wasn't even half over, ad the Hawks were up 2-0.
  • Brad Richards scored the 3rd Blackhawks goal of the game about halfway through the second period. This was a perfect time for the Hawks, because the Wild had the momentum. Kane led the rush and tried to take a shot, but it was blocked. The puck conveniently ended up on the stick of Richards, who had a lot of net to shoot at.
  • In the final minutes of the second period, a Marian Hossa defensive play turned into a Toews/Saad/Oduya 3-on-1. Toews tried to force the pass to Saad, and it was blocked by Spurgeon. The puck sat out in the high slot until Oduya was able to step up and tee off. Spurgeon blocked that shot too, but the momentum made the puck knuckle past a committed Backstrom. Ugly goal, but the Blackhawks are owed a few of those.
  • For the first time in his Blackhawks career, Teuvo Teravainen looked like an NHL player. He looked comfortable and was involved in some legitimate scoring chances. I cannot wait until he has full confidence.
  • While this isn't a true goalie win, Crawford had 36 saves, and the Blackhawks were out shot 37-35. Nothing to complain abut there.
  • The Blackhawks were dominant at the dots, winning 61%. Shaw was the Blackhawks leader, winning 8 of 10.
  • Shoutcast Tuesday night.
The Bad
  • The Hawks started out fast and furious, but they let the Wild take momentum through the second half of the first and first half of second periods.
  • Noted shithead Matt Cooke was the fortunate beneficiary of the 3rd pairing matchup, and picked up a fat rebound off Crawford's pad to break Crawford's shutout bid.
  • Four days off is usually a good thing, but just as the Blackhawks are getting hot again, they have to sit on their thumbs.

The Ugly
  • Nik Hjalmarsson got turned around like a top, by Jason Zucker, late in the second period, eventually taking a penalty, which then resulted in a penalty shot. Zucker shot wide, so all was forgotten, but not Hammer's best play.
The Lineblender



Saturday, January 10, 2015

Blackhawks at Oilers
5-2 Loss Recap

Runnin' On Empty

by Patrick Stankus

When looking at the schedule, this Minnesota/Edmonton back to back was an odd one to say the least. While that is no excuse, the goal should have been take 3 of 4 points, anything less, its a failure. Call me Mr. Negativity, but this back to back is a colossal failure. While the Hawks did leave Minnesota with a win, it was an ugly win to say the least. Unfortunately for the Hawks on Friday night, their energy was still no where to be found after that first period in Minnesota. Friday night's game in Edmonton was just as enjoyable as getting your wisdom teeth pulled.

This one was ugly folks, I'm not going to ramble on too much, frankly because I think I'll pass out if I do. Brandon Saad opened the scoring for the Hawks, after crashing the net, and knocking home a rebound to give the Hawks a 1-0 lead. The Oilers then rattled off two straight goals to give them a 2-1 lead after one.

If you want to be Johnny Positive, Brandon Saad gave the Blackhawks a slight ray of hope, as he added his second of the night just after 5 minutes into the second period. From then on, it was all Oilers. Just under a minute later, Jeff Petry put the Oilers up 3-2 and for good. In the third, Nail Yakupov (best hockey name ever) and Taylor Hall tallied goals, and finally put the Blackhawks out of their misery, with a 5-2 win.

The Good
- I'm being generous, but I'll give Saad credit for two goals, and the way he did it. By crashing the net for rebounds.
- You lost to Edmonton, there is no more good.

The Bad
- Antti Raanta was ok in net for the Hawks. No doubt he was left hung out to dry on a couple of goals, but on Petry's goal, his rebound "control" was on display.
- Teuvo was back in the lineup, and while he was a -1 on the night, he was actually pretty decent out there. Take it in stride though, it was against the Oilers. Either way, it was good to see him look a little more comfortable out there.
- Nordstrom and Kruger couldn't crack the 10 minute mark tonight, while is puzzling considering how bad the Hawks were.

The Ugly
- How about the entire fucking game?
- Richards, Kane, Seabrook, and Keith were all -3 on the night. Bad games are bound to happen.
- Rundblad's bad high sticking penalty came back to bite the Hawks, as the Oilers scored on the ensuing power play.
- The Hawks only mustered 21 shots on the night, see the Minnesota game as well. Hopefully this isn't a trend developing.
- I've seen enough of Michal Rozsival. Seriously, how the fuck did he allow Brad Richards to beat him back on defense? I know the Oilers still scored on the play, but again, how do you let Richards beat you back? I'd love to see a slowest skater contest in All Star Weekend.
- 17 giveaways. I sure hope the Oilers liked the wrapping paper the Hawks used when they gave them the game.
- Hits are meaningless right? Well the Hawks were blown out, and they were STILL OUT HIT 29-17.
- Ok, I'm done, I've had enough of this day. Did I mention I managed to fall off of a truck today?


Thursday, January 8, 2015

Blackhawks at Wild 4-2 Win Recap

Wild Things

That picture is for all you meatballs out there who think Corey Crawford should stop every shot he faces. I bet those same meatballs also didn't have a problem with a useless, yes, USELESS "hockey player" in Dan Carcillo suiting up instead of "The Savior" Teuvo Teravainen. Yes, even me as a "Teuvo Hater" can't defend this coaching decision by Quenneville, but whatever. Now onto the actual game...

Prior to the game, the Wild played a video tribute to J.P. Parise, Zach Parise's father, who passed away yesterday. It was a nice tribute to one of the North Stars greats. Thoughts to the Parise family.

Unlike recent games, the Blackhawks came out of the gate strong. They were skating circles around the Wild and nothing short of absolutely clowning them.  Sharp opened the scoring with his 9th of the season, just past the 5 minute mark of the first period. Patrick Kane added a power play goal, after a sweet dish by Brad Richards, and after one it was 2-0 Hawks. Looks like the Mike Yeo meltdown yesterday worked well for the Wild.

Oh, did I mention the Mike Yeo meltdown, because there may have been a Part II that took place during the first intermission. The roles were completely reversed when the second began, it was the Wild that took it to the Hawks. Jason Zucker scored early in the second to cut the lead in half, and luckily for the Hawks, their goaler, kept the score a 2-1 after two.

To say the Hawks were "better" in the third period, is well, not saying much. Despite that, the Hawks did manage to get on the board first, courtesy of a Bryan Bickell rocket after a pass by Kane. This Bryan Bickell guy is kind of looking like he wants to be a hockey player now. I'm cautiously optimistic. The Wild didn't go quietly, as Jason Pominville tallied a power play goal, to cut the lead to 3-2. However it wasn't enough, as Bickell added his second of the night, this time of the empty net variety, and the Hawks escaped from Minneapolis with a 4-2 win. Onto Edmonton.

The Good
- Corey Crawford. 42 saves, this was a game he stole. Plain and simple.
- I can't believe I'm writing this, Bryan Bickell. I will not elaborate though.
- Somehow David Rundblad recorded his 6th assist on the season tonight. I know I'm surprised too. Maybe he's becoming, dare I say it, serviceable? 
- Seeing Marcus Kruger return after that brutal hit by Thomas Vanek was good to see....More on this hit later.

The Bad
- Patrick Sharp had a nice little parade to the sin bin in the 2nd period, recording two penalties in about 6 minutes.
- Everyone enjoy that intimation Dan Carcillo showed after Vanek's hit on Kruger. Seriously what the fuck did Stan Bowman see in this guy to sign him not once, not twice, but three times.

The Ugly
- The second period by the Hawks was putrid. It was the complete opposite of how they started the game. Its almost as if they got the prima donna perfect attitude of "we got this game in the bag" during the first intermission.
- Thomas Vanek's hit on Marcus Kruger was dangerous to say the least. But I am perfectly fine with him being assessed a 5 minute major, and nothing more. No suspension is warranted in my opinion.
- If its Quenneville's idea to get us bloggers up in arms about his decisions, then mission accomplished sir.
- On the lineup topic, this is exactly why I didn't want to see Teuvo called up. What good is it in developing him if he plays two games, and then is a healthy scratch? It doesn't help him. It only hurts him. Keep dicking around like this, and soon his confidence will be shot, and it will be back to the drawing board. When you're trying to develop a prospect, this isn't the way to go about.
- Its not every game you can be outshot 44-20 and walk away with a win. Consider this a gift Hawks.



Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Corey Crawford Meatball-Palooza

by Gatekeeper

So, How bout them Blackhawks, eh?

Last night, after seeing so people I highly respect as hockey players jump up Corey Crawford's puckered ass for a SHUT OUT LOSS, I decided to put some illustrations together. In said illustrations it is shown that while Crawford is not completely absolved of blame, the two goals he gave up in the first 1:17 of the game were landed more on the shoulders of the circus spectacle of players in front of him. Have a look for yourself, if you're that one person that hasn't seen them:

NOW... this is not to say that Crawford hasn't had shaky first periods. HE HAS. I have been critical of him on the last two Shoutcasts. He has not been the "pre-drunken concert" Corey Crawford. If you're going to feed me that "rebound control" horseshit, you're wrong. A wide open player has time to size you up, 12 feet out in the slot. He takes a shot low to your left. What is the ONLY thing you can do? Kick your pad out. Just so happens that there was a WIDE OPEN PLAYER standing there. Stand in net, in full gear, and take a 70mph shot, and TRY not to kick it out in that direction. IMPOSSIBLE! It's physics. He has a fraction of a second to drop down, kick the shot out (not to the wide fucking open guy). When he DOES kick it to MacKinnon, Crawford has to get back up and shuffle over to MacKinnon, AND STAY STANDING, because just simply sliding over would have still left the top shelf (peanut butter) exposed. Now, try this move...in real time...just on a floor. Again, IMPOSSIBLE! But because he makes $6 million Crawford is different. "No I'm sorry, Stan Bowman, I'm not worth $6 Million, please offer me less". Corey Crawford is NOT the entire reason this Blackhawks team is slumping slightly.

That being said, Teuvo Teravainen isn't the reason, either, but that is another meatball story for another meatball day.

My point last night was that, people are taking the easy out. Blame the goalie. Hey, every goal is really the goalie's fault, right? If he stopped 100% of the shots he faced?

This is not reality. It is as real as a player scoring on every shot he ever takes. None blocked. EVERY FUCKING SHOT. Kiss my hairy ass!

Anyone looking at these screenshots can see that the Blackhawks second defensive pair, specifically Johnny "Best Johnny on the Ice" Oduya, was having adventures in babysitting. AGAIN, this s not putting the loss solely on THEIR shoulders either. They had two bad shifts, back to back. Quenneville should have pulled them off after the first goal, but that didn't happen either.

Let's talk about another player that might have helped, Bryan Bickell. He had a chance to scoop a loose puck into a gaping net and pulled a Viktor Stalberg.

Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Blackhawks vs Avalanche
2-0 Shutout Loss Recap


by Gatekeeper

How fitting was it that the Colorado Avalanche rolled into town Tuesday night after the first winter storm of the year. Lets get right into it...

The first period could not have started any worse. Not even two minutes in, and the Blackhawks were down 2 on 3 shots. Things calmed down and the Blackhawks actually out shot the Avs 17-10 when they hit the intermission. I don't even want to even break it down any more than that, because it wasn't worth acknowledging.

The Blackhawks did everything but score in the middle period. They put 21 shots on net and only allowed 5. Two failed powerplays probably would have helped, but they came away with nothing to show for their effort.

The Blackhawks third period was more of the same, as they out shot the Avs 16-8. They were still unable to break down the Varlomov barrier and ended up losing 2-0. Another opposing goalie stealing a game.

The Good
  • Pat, Eddie and everyone else kept talking about how shaky that Varlamov was, but he went out and made 54 saves en route to a shutout. That's not what you consider "shaky". If that is shaky, then I'll take a shaky goalie every night.
  • There is nothing good about getting shutout 2-0
The Bad
  • The Power Play has some early chances to chop the Avs lead up, but wasn't able to tally at all.
  • Marcus Kruger taking a penalty to negate a potential powerplay was pretty god damn stupid. Tyson Barrie's acting job was equally as brutal.
  • The Blackhawks attempted over NINETY shots, and scored on exactly ZERO
  • The Hawks were shitcanned at the dots, winning only 37%. The Captain led the way winning only 7 of 23.

The Ugly
  • Not even two minutes into the game, and the Blackhawks were already down 2-0. First, Oduya got walked by John Mitchell, who was left in the slot to size Crawford up. Not to fear, though, Crawford made the save. The rebound ended up on the stick of Nathan MacKinnon who buried it. Oduya was flat on the ice and Hjalmarsson was covering a non existent player in front of the net, which left MacKinnon wide open. Twenty four seconds later, Oduya got caught flat footed and Hjalmarsson wasn't able to cover up for him. Max Talbot and Nathan MacKinnon ended up on a 2-on-0 with Crawford, and the puck squirted under him after he made the initial stop. Not Crawford's fault, but he'll get the blame from all the idiot meatballs.
  • Midway through the third period the Blackhawks turned it over to Matt Duchene all alone in front of Crawford, and he couldn't get a shot off.
  • Just after the halfway point, Jon Toews not only took a penalty, but mouthed off to the official. This awarded him an extra 2 minutes in the box. Luckily the second half of the powerplay was negated by a stupid Avs too many men penalty.
  • I had the good fortune to miss most of the latter part of the first period with a 2 1/2 year old that couldn't control his incontinence. This was ironically and similarly fragrant to the Blackhawks, and Johnny Oduya's, opening 2 minutes.

The Lineblender



Sunday, January 4, 2015

Blackhawks vs. Stars 5-4 OT Win Recap

               What Time Is It? Teuvo Time

by @Patrick_Stankus
 Perhaps you heard that some hot shot prospect was going to be making his season debut tonight for the Blackhawks. That guy, I mean kid, is highly touted prospect Teuvo Teravainen. Now, I will warn you, if you're a Teuvo lover, then I suggest you might not like this recap. I probably should have entitled it the Puckin' Hostile Roast of Teuvo Teravainen. Any way, enough about a 20 year old prospect who probably won't amount to much, other than, we'll go with Jack Skille. (Lighten up)

As for the more important things, you know like a divisional game against Dallas, in a continuation of recent play in the NHL, sloppy, ugly hockey was on display at the UC on Sunday night. I mean, if I had played the drinking game of, "take a drink every time turnover was mentioned," then I would be in NO condition to actually write this recap.

Jamie Benn (who is the most underrated player in the NHL) got the scoring going 4 minutes in, but the lead didn't last long. Just over a minute later Brandon Saad tied the game, after a sweet dish from El Captain, and that's where we were at after one.

You like scoring you say? Well then the first five minutes of the second period were right up your alley.  That scoring bunch saw Dallas goals by Jordie Benn and Eric Cole, with a Patrick Kane goal sandwiched in the middle. Then late in the period, by parking himself in front of the net, Bryan Bickell was able to redirect a shot past Kari Lehtonen to tie the game at three. Woohoo, the roller coaster of a period ended.

If you didn't think it could get worse by the goal scorers of the game, well haha, joke is on you. Eric Cole added his second of the game (facepalm), on a redirect four minutes into the third. The $2 million dollar bargain Brad Richards added his 8th of the season (that's two more than Bickell folks) to tie game at four. And that's where we'd be as the game headed to overtime.

The highlight of the overtime came by way of a Corey Crawford turnover (DRINK), in which he played the puck up the slot to a wide open Cody Eakin. Luckily for Crawford he didn't place it on an actual hockey player's stick, because otherwise it would have been game over. Crawford was able to slide back and make the save, therefore, ass saved. For the sake of all of us, Patrick Sharp ended the game just over a minute into overtime, after a nice slap pass from Duncan Keith. Blackhawks win, 5-4, run away because this was an UGLY win.

The Great
- Look at the healthy scratches!!  Finally Gorilla Salad finds his ass in the press box.

The Good
- Once again, the Blackhawks were able to battle back, and win a seesaw game in which they weren't very good. I guess it is better to be lucky than good sometimes.
- Que the line blender, everyone on the Blackhawks saw at least 10 minutes of ice time. 
- We'll give a shout out to 4 Blackhawks who had multiple points tonight; Hossa and Keith with 2 assists each, while Richards and Sharp had a goal and assist each.
- Eh, what the hell, 1 of 3 on the night, I'll take it. Baby steps power play.

The Bad
- The Savior, I mean Teuvo had an awesome gooa, oh wait, he didn't score. I sorely disappointed. I was expecting a hat trick and for him to clown everyone on the ice based on everything I read on Friday afternoon. Lower your expectations folks. You're being way too unrealistic if you think he's the next version of Toews and Kane.
- As much as I am a Marcus Kruger fan, tonight was not his best performance. -2 on the night.
- Dallas managed to block 27 shots tonight. Time to start moving into open shooting lanes for the Blackhawks.

The Ugly
- What the fuck Corey Crawford???!!! Who the fuck do you think you are playing the puck like that? Marty Turco? Stay in the fucking net. 
- That Dallas to the Western Conference Final pick of mine, one word. BARF!
- I couldn't tell which did more work tonight? The LineBlender, or the Turnover Machine? I thought Versteeg was out?
- Could someone tell EVERY Chicago sportscaster how to correctly pronounce Teuvo Teravainen's name?
- Did you see the forecast for this week? 

Thursday, January 1, 2015

2015 Winter Classic
Chicago Blackhawks at Washington Capitals
3-2 Loss Recap

"White Wedding"

by Gatekeeper and @Patrick_Stankus

The Blackhawks traveled to the Nationals baseball Park in Washington DC, Thursday, for a shot at winning on one of the biggest stages the NHL has available, the 2015 Winter Classic. After much speculation, and a post warmups conversation on the ice with both teams, the NHL and players decided that the sunny weather was not enough of distraction to delay the start of the game. As a result, the puck was dropped at 12:20 PM, in sunny and warmer than expected Nationals Park.

The Blackhawks were out shot 8-7 and out scored 1-0 in the opening half of the first period. After the 10 minute mark, the team switched sides as to not give either an advantage with the glare and shadow issues. The Hawks were out shot 7-5 in the second half of the first, and each team had a goal. It looked like the shadows and glare would no longer be a factor for the rest of the game, so

The Blackhawks came out slow in the second period, but rebounded nicely to out shoot the Caps 13-7 and score the only goal of the period. There was action, but it was nothing like the first period.

The third period was more like the second, but the Caps were on the offensive. They out shot the Blackhawks 13-9, and scored the only goal very late, to win the game. Perfect way to kick off 2015.

The Good
  • The first Blackhawks goal was with about 6 minutes remaining in the first period. Just moments after the Caps Backstrom was whistled for a penalty, Patrick Sharp beat Holtby with a long clean shot from the blue line through an Andrew Shaw screen.
  • After the Blackhawks slow start to the second period, and about 3 minutes in, Toews, Hossa and Saad jumped on a loose puck behind the Caps net. The puck literally died right behind the Caps net and Hossa jumped on it. He kicked it out to El Capitan, who immediately shoveled it to Saad, and into a wide open net.
  • Crawford was not terrible, nor was he great. Saving 32 of 35 is admirable, but the last 2 goals were just so-so at best.
The Bad
  • The Caps took a 2-0 lead after the halfway point of the first period. The Caps caught the Hawks 3rd defensive pair out on the ice and neither Rundbland nor Rozsival could get a hold of a rebound in front of Crawford. Ovechkin swooped in buried the puck, putting the Blackhawks in an early hole.
  • Late in the first period, Backstrom and Ovechkin had a clean 2-on-1 and all Blackhawks fans started sweating. Luckily for the Hawks, Ovechkin forces an awful pass and they never even got a shot off.
  • The adequate Kris Versteeg was hurt blocking a shot early in the third period and went off the ice in distress. That could be ugly for him and throw the recent chemistry off a bit.

The Ugly
  • Big middle finger from Pat to AT&T U-Verse after he lost his service midway through the first period.
  • The camera angles were fucking terrible. NBC insisted on using the stupid robocam on the wire, and it was useless. Here are a few examples of the annoying, useless angles:

  • The first goal of the game, a 4-on-4 goal, was a pretty ugly for Brent Seabrook. He was unable to control a loaded grenade and the bouncing pass squirted past him. Eric Fehr was on the move and blew right past Seabrook, resulting in a breakaway. Fehr made a little backhand/forehand move and tucked the puck in around Crawford's leg.
  • We have talked about Corey Crawford and the fact that he has started slow in almost every game since coming back from his injury, and this one was no exception. Not only has he been starting slow, but the way he has been waving his glove at the puck is wasted effort. Something is up.
  • The Blackhawks came out in the second period and gave up two quality chances off the post. Not the ideal way to start after a bad first.
  • The Hawks blew a long 5-on-3 in the middle of the second period that could have blown the game wide open. Instead they used it as an opportunity to show just what Clown Shoes their powerplay is, at this point. Enjoy our pain, NHL.
  • The final goal of the game, and game winner, was scored with 12.9 seconds. If you wanted a storyline, this was it. Former Blackhawk Troy Brouwer was able get a hold of a loose puck, on the powerplay, after Ovechkin was stopped by a Brandon Saad Paul Bunyan impression, and surprise Crawford. This was all set up by a terrible hooking call against Jonny Toews. All that said, the Blackhawks had the 5-on-3, and 6 total powerplays. You knew a makeup call was coming.
  • Even after Versteeg went out hurt, Gorilla Salad only played THREE shifts. Why is this happening? It makes zero sense. It was equally annoying that he ran around in his first couple of shifts trying to start shit.
  • Who knew? Gavin DeGraw is not this guy

    I wanted to see the guy from the Love Boat sing.
The Lineblender



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