All-Starpalooza Snubs and Flubs

"Patty Cake, Patty Cake"

Yesterday it was announced that Tomax and Xamot (Patricks Kane and Sharp for those that aren't up on their 80's G.I. Joe characters) were selected to the All-Star Extravaganza and Pig Roast. Sharp CERTAINLY deserves to be there, but I could go either way with Kane. He's been hurt and not necessarily All-Star worthy. I'm a hometown guy, but I can assure you there are at least half a dozen guys that have played more consistent hockey that should be out there, and if I wanted to be a real Debbie Downer I would further point out how Duncan Keith should be watching it home on TV too, but he was actually voted in by the fans. I guess if it keeps the axis of evil, Datsyuk and Zetterberg, out I'm copacetic.

Whenever something like this comes about there will always be debate about selections and snubs. This is no different. I have one major gripe, and two snubs.

Now, you could make cases for Zetterberg, Datsyuk, Stastny, Suter, and a few others, but really, the list could go on forever. My major gripe is with the selection of Goalie Marc-Andre Fleury from the Pens, and I'll tell you why. For at least the first quarter of the season, Fleury wasn't even the starting Goalie on his own team. Veteran Brent Johnson would have been listed as the #1 netminder, and Fleury couldn't stop a beach ball rolled at him. Tomas Vokoun, of the Florida Panthers, should have easily beat him out. Fleury's stats aren't even all that spectacular either, but I guess the small market teams have to suffer somehow. Apparently, once you get your Stanley Cup gold jacket you're given all the special considerations.

The snub really isn't on the radar, but it has to do with the rookie selections, for whatever silly horseshoe throwing competition they have planned. There are two Blackhawks rookies that deserve a look; One-Trick-Bick, and CrawDaddy. Bickell has fairly quietly put together a very impressive first half. He's 4th in the league overall, 5th in goals, 5th in assists, and 1st in shooting percentage. If that doesn't warrant a rookie selection, I don't know what does. CrawDaddy is in the same boat. He's right behind Philly's Sergei Bobrovsky in just about every rookie goaltender category and first overall in GAA. Unfortunately, the fab 4 took up the quota of All-Star slots for the Hawks, and I don't think goaltenders can be included in this complicated rookie jarts tossing competition.

Read More

Deserted Island

They are just milking the hell out of this Stanley Cup ordeal. I'm as happy as the next guy about last year, and I realize it was technically for the 50th anniversary of the '61 team, but these memorial celebrations are getting slightly out of hand. On the other hand, I suppose you have to have some kind of big ordeal to get people out to watch the Islanders. On to the game...

The Hawks absolutely owned the first period. They didn't exactly light up the scoreboard, but they had a serious advantage in shots, and puck possession time, but led after the first twenty 1-0. The Hawks came out fast in the second and took a quick 3-0 lead and finished the second up 5-0. The Third period was pretty much a snoozefest as the Hawks clearly took their foot off the gas, and almost ruined Corey Crawford's shutout, but he stood tall and held things in check.

The Good

• It's only took a few minutes and 2 powerplays for Shooter to take a pass in his favorite place, the back door, and deposit it just over the Islander goal line. At that point the Hawks were absolutely making the Isles look like a bad AHL team.
  
• "Give-n-a-go, Go-n-a-Give" Pat Foley, you're awesome.
  
• Fourth Line, Energy Line, I don't care what you call them, but I love everything about them, except the amount of playing time they get.
  
• Boss 81 was left wide open in the slot for the Hawks second goal, and Kopecky hit him. The Islanders are just awful. They kept handing it over to the Hawks, and what did they expect would happen? Boss was a +3 on the night, now lets see a little more of that against an NHL team.
  
• Aaaaaaand the Hawks made the Isles pay again on a Kaner one timer goal, off a great feed from Captain Serious. Again, this was like watching the Hawks play a bad AHL team.
  
• Invisi-Bolly even made an appearance last night, and looked like a professional, with a nice top cheese roofer, from Boss 81.
  
• I feel like this is just the Hawks picking on the retarded kid, with Hammer's goal in the final minute of the second. It closed out the scoring, and seriously, it was painful to watch the Isles play.
  
• CrawDaddy finally got his well deserved shutout, and he really DOES deserve it.
  

The Bad

• Nick Leddy finally had his first major goof as he let Michael Grabner by him and in on Crawford. Luckily CrawDaddy was up to the job and made a great save. Welcome to the show, Kiddo. Grabner had another shorthanded breakaway in the second and couldn't even get a flipping shot off. Horrible.
  
• The Hawks really tried to hand the Islanders a goal on their third period powerplay, but, again, they really sucked.
  
• Leddy and Hendry AGAIN had a major gaffe leaving Bailey wide open in front of the net. CrawDaddy bailed them out again. I realize you're up 5-0 and everything, but shit guys, show some effort for your goalie. Speaking for CrawDaddy, you're welcome gentlemen...
  
  
• Zenon Konopka is a complete ballbag. Real tough when you just got shutout 5-0 aren't you?
  

The Ugly

• The only thing Ugly in this game was the Islanders. They had their chances, but they are really a bad team.
  

Here are the video highlights for your viewing pleasure:

Read More

Friday Snorefest

This is urgency? I don't see it. The Hawks came out very flat in the first period last night. If you missed the first period, you didn't miss much. The period ended with the Hawks getting outshot and tied 0-0. The second started with the Sens getting a powerplay goal and the Hawks coming right back with a goal of their own. The rest of the second was a little more eventful, but both teams went into the locker room tied at 1. The Hawks scored about halfway through the third but couldn't hold the lead, AGAIN, and they couldn't score in OT either. So, they had to pull out a win in the Shootout.

The Good

• Shooter has just been on fire, and it continues. It started with Brian Campbell putting a great pass right onto the tape of the Sharpie, and he redirected it perfectly.
  
• Nice to see Invisi-Bolly make an appearance and actually get a nice pass off to Fernandog. Elliott just make an incredible save.
  
• Kaners goal in the third was a total gift. First, it's turned over at the blue line and then defenseman Chris Phillips just allowed Kaner to set up his shot. Thank you Mr. Bad D-man.
  
• Once again, CrawDaddy had a quiet but solid game. I'll take it.
  

The Bad

• The adventures of Duncan Seabrook continued once again. One of such adventures led to a 2-on-0. Swell! Just SWELL!
  
• Hello penalty kill! Don't like you very much do we? Apparently not, because the Hawks have gone from bad to simply inferior.
  

The Ugly

• Getting out shot by the Sens 11-8 is not a good thing. Starting a very important weekend series where they MUST take two points, and they come out of the box looking like they are in slow motion.
  
• Great job holding the lead, guys. If Crawford had held onto that puck, the Hawks would have been able to change their forwards to more solid defensive players, but instead they took an icing call and couldn't change their players. We all know what happened after that. For my money, Toews, Hossa, and maybe Kaner are out there in that last shift, but we had the Invisi-line of Bolly, Bickell and Fernandog.
  

Shootout

• Jonny B Goode went 5-hole on Elliott
  
• Kovalev missed the cage on CrawDaddy
  
• Kaner sniped Elliott glove side
  
• Alfredsson hit the post and was denied.
  

Here are the video highlights for your viewing pleasure:

Read More

Your Hands Build Me Up When I'm Sinking

As expected, The Blackhawks announced today that Nick Leddy will be joining the team for tonight's game in Ottawa. As I mentioned the other day, I'm not sure I really agree with this, for a number of reasons. First of all, who will he play with? Quenneville is not breaking up Keith and Seabrook, or Soupie and Hammer. So, your remaining choices to flank Leddy are Dick Boynton, Jordan Hendry and Big Show Scott. I can't say I trust ANY of those three clowns to tutor the young Jedi. Boynton is brainless, Hendry is still green himself, and Big Show isn't anything more than a hired pair of fists. At least when Cullisnore was out there, you had one guy you could rely on to play solid positionally. I would have been semi-comfortable with Leddy taking his cues from Cullisnore. They are really hanging a lot of responsibility on Leddy's head because if he screws up, like most 19 year olds do, there is no one to really cover his butt. As much as I like Jordan Hendry, he isn't an established NHL defenseman, and won't be able to consistently watch #8's back.

Lets be realistic now, anyone that thinks Nick Leddy will show up and magically change the flim/flam attitude of this team, they have been huffing too many exhaust fumes. The only thing this will bring on is disarray on the back end. For roughly 35 games, this team has played with the same 7 1/2 defensemen, and now one that has played 36 out of 42 games is vacationing in Rock-beria and the new one has a total of 5 NHL games experience under his belt. If Leddy was moistening the boxers of the team management, he wouldn't have been playing for Rock-beria or the World Juniors in the first place, and remember, he was a -7 with the Ice Hogs before he shipped off to the WJC's.

The last concern is his contract. Once he plays his tenth NHL game, he's considered a rookie and his contract goes into effect. If they don't plan on sticking with him, is this worth burning up his rookie year to play on with 3 average-to-bad players, and get his lumps handed to him? I guess that's why we're not NHL GM's. I hope he lights the world on fire and never looks back, but common sense has a strange way of showing up in times like these.

Read More

The Material Never Stops Coming

"Yeah, Dude, I found this great place to troll for tail and they have most of their teeth, I'll just tell them you're my Dad"


Just when I thought I'd have time to let my blood pressure settle in, the Hawks brass announce another bonehead move. Jassen Cullimore has be assigned to Rock-beria. The one Defenseman that has actually been consistent, other than Brian Campbell, and they send him packing. Stan-bo...buddy...PAL, what is THIS? Cullisnore is not the reason they can't kill penalties, he's not the reason the team doesn't give a shit, and he's not the reason you're currently an embarrassment. He HAS, though, been more than anyone expected, and done what he's been asked to do. I was one of the most harsh critics of Mr. Cullisnore going into the season, but he's done nothing but carry Nick Boynton's stupid ass on his back and play solid defense for 40 games. He's never going to out skate people or score goals, but he is big, physical, and can still plant a guy into the third row of seats. I don't get it, and it makes NO sense.

Where do they go from here?

• Feed us Nick Boynton and Jordan Hendry as a third pairing? That's not Batman and Robin, there. More like the Batdope and Boy Blunder.
  
• Put John Scott back on the blue line with Hendry or Boynton? Please don't do that to us! PLEASE, we BEG of you!
  
• Go young and bring up Leddy, Lalonde, or Connolly?
  
• Trade or pick up someone off waivers?
  

I really don't know. Just when you think it makes sense, Jake Dowell and Jack Skille are losing playing time to the great Ryan Johnson and John Scott. I'll die an early death with Hendry and Boynton playing together, or if I have to watch John Scott attempt to play defense. The Hawks have no one to mentor the young guys on that third line, so they'd just get eaten alive until they caught on. The last option really doesn't make sense either, because the waiver wire isn't exactly overflowing with hidden gems, and they can't afford to trade anything away. Please show me what great secret you have hidden in your back pocket.

EDIT - Apparently Nick Leddy is expected to called up for Friday's game. I cringe at who he'll be playing with.

In separate news last week, Twenty year old Hawks 2009 draft pick, and silver medal winning Canadian Junior team member Dylan Olsen signed an entry level deal with the Hawks and will be assigned to Rock-beria as well. The deal is worth $2.305 million over 3 years, at a cap hit of about $768,000. This is a move for the future, because he's not ready for the big boys, yet.

Read More

The Stars at Night, Are Big and Bright

""Just like old times in the shower, man"

Coach Q was worried about this team and this game, coming in, and it looks like there was good reason. The Hawks gave up a quick first period 2-0 lead even though they out shot the Stars. The second period was off to a fairly bland and uneventful start until the Hawks scored a weak goal and lit a flame. They scored just over 2 minutes later and later missed a penalty shot, which led to a tie score going into the third period. The third, again, ended up being a huge disappointment, and the Hawks blew another prime chance.

I hate to always be the critical one, well actually I don't, but there isn't much more "time" to figure this out. We are now over half way through the season, and they have been mediocre at best. They've given away game after game, and chance after chance. IF they make the playoffs, and I assume they will, it's going to be a quick exit. If you can't be in the top HALF of the league in penalty killing, you're doomed.

The Good

• Just when I'm scoffing silently at Fernandog's weak wrister, it's ends up going off Lehtonen's glove and dribbling into the net. God Awful. It's not like it was a One Trick Bick snipe or anything. Thank your lucky stars on that one, because that was a gift, Dog.
  
• Speaking of gifts; Just a few minutes later TomoKop out-muscled three Dallas players to poke his own rebound in the net, after Lehtonen gave up a juicy rebound, and Kaner dished a nice pass. At least Kaner can pass, because in just about every other category, he's been USELESS!
  
• Is Robidas really that worried about Big Show in front of the net? If he is, he's short on active brain cells. The guy can barely crack the five minute mark in playing time and you feel the need to blatantly cross check him right in front of the ref?
  
• Like Eddie pointed out, I was late to finally see SOMEONE hit Burish. I know they are friends, but you can't let him just run around like an asshole doing whatever he pleases all night. He gets off on being a pest, so it was time to smack him like a bad puppy. Atta boy, Seabrook. You can still smack your buddies around a little. It's hockey, not ballroom dancing.
  
• You wouldn't see Dick Boynton leading the rush up the middle of the ice and drawing a high sticking penalty the way Hendry did. Just Saying.
  
• The Empty netter is irrelevant at that point and really not Toews fault. He put it where he should have and Eriksson got lucky.
  

The Bad

• Hossa got a breakaway in the first few minutes of the game on a great pass off the stick of Jonny B Goode. Another chance squandered.
  
• Good Ol Tomo-Kop at it again. Two and a half minutes in and he gets a hooking call which...wait for it...ended up in the back of the net. The Hawks Penalty Kill is simply terrible. TERRIBLE!
  
• This game got ugly early, with two powerplay goals against in the first eight minutes. I just can't see this team going anywhere with a PK team this bad, and have I mentioned how bad it is?
  
• When Eddie says, "The good thing is that it's only 2-0", you know they've played an atrocious period. Toews was CLEARLY disgusted between periods, as he should be.
  
• Pick-To-Click Vik did everything he needed to on the penalty shot, after he was hauled down on a partial breakaway. To hit three posts in one shot is extremely rare, but entertaining to watch. That's just BAD luck, and he deserved that one.
  
• The Penalty Kill once AGAIN failed Corey Crawford, making that three powerplay goals against, and Mike Ribeiro's second of the game. That's embarrassing. Utterly EMBARRASSING!
  
• For the second game in a row, the Hawks missed a wide open net in a critical point, and this one cost them the game. Sharpie was tied up, but they NEEDED that goal.
  
• I'm not sure what One Trick Bick was doing when he decided to pass it off Hammers foot from behind his own net and putting it right on the stick of the Dallas forward, but it looked like something you'd see in a bad Men's League game.
  

The Ugly

• Once again Jake the Snake and Skillington were sitting. Wrap it up with a pretty little bow all you want, but it's bad. This is going to make me mental, which is entertaining for all of you, but it's going to lead to an aneurysm.
  
• I'm not sure I saw Ryan Johnson in the second half of the game at all. So, tell me again why he's playing and Dowell isn't? Someone? Four minutes and thirteen seconds, and ZERO on the penalty kill. That's what the great Ryan Johnson played. The faceoff artist. The penalty killer extraordinaire. Not like they needed him when they gave up THREE POWERPLAY GOALS! I've about had it with Quenneville's lousy games. It's to a point where common sense is nowhere to be found. It took almost 40 games to figure out that Jordan Hendry is probably a better option than Nick Boynton? Joel needs to spend some time on the internet because we've been pulling out hair out, well those of us WITH hair, for about 30 games.
  
• Of everything, the biggest "WTF" of the night has to be the fact that Big Show had 55 seconds of powerplay time. Really? That's ALMOST a full shift. What is THAT sloth going to do on the powerplay? Positionally, he's lost. He has a below average shot, and he can't move. WHAT IS THIS? Viktor Stalberg has been snake bitten, but I will promise you that he has more value to the powerplay than JOHN SCOTT! AYE CARUMBA, AND JIMINY CHRISTMAS ON A CRACKER!
  

Because most players wearing a Blackhawks uniform at this point completely disgust me, I leave you with this...serenity now, serenity now: Here are the flippin video highlights for your viewing pleasure:

Read More

Kings Ransom

Not exactly the way you want to welcome your Captain back, but CrawDaddy held the Hawk in the game and the score to 1-1 after the first period. Not an ideal performance against a very dangerous Kings team. The Hawks pretty much dominated the second, but gave up a late breakaway goal to tie it up at twos for the third. The Hawks got a little luck in the third period, and held on to a 4-3 lead. Just something about the Hawks that the Kings can't solve. Too bad the Hawks can't play them 6 more times.

The Good

• CrawDaddy was the man of the game and showed why he's taken over as the #1 guy in net with that last glove save. He's confident and extremely solid.
  
• It was a matter of time before Boss 81 put a puck in the net and where better than on the powerplay? Boss was the hot hand for the first half of the game, putting one off the post in the second, as well.
  
• Sharpie's powerplay goal looked EASY. They toyed around with the Kings defense and looked like a dominant squad. Can't argue with #1 in the league.
  
• Thank god we were spared Nick Boynton for a second straight contest. I was so tired of his bonehead plays. And John Scott...JOHN SCOTT! I don't miss the big show ONE BIT. In fact I forgot he was even on the team until they showed Wesgarth's ugly face, in the third.
  
• That second Sharpie goal was pure determination. He wanted to go to the net and wasn't going to be stopped. Huge goal, and huge effort from a team captain. Kopecky did his best to get in the way, and could have really fouled it up, if Sharpie wasn't in such a zone.
  
• About midway through the third period was the first time all year that I saw the Hawks look like sharks that smelled blood. That is how they played all last season, and I'd forgotten what it looked like.
  
• How that Toews goal got in the net, is beyond me. I have no words for that. I don't think the Kings could have thrown it in their own net any better. One big WTF moment.
  
• I giggled to myself when Invisi-Bolly was pushing a broken stick around, during a third period powerplay, so that it was in the passing lane of the Kings players. Slick move, kid. Kudos for that one.
  

The Bad

• I thought Tyler Kennedy was pug ugly, but what a work of art that Ryan Smyth is. OOFAA!! Schnoz-a-saurus.
  
• Even though it's a good thing, its for bad reasons, but Kaner being demoted to what is really the 3rd line is well deserved. His pass to Sharpie on the second period powerplay goal was very nice, but he clearly doesn't have that overdrive gear. What's better? Half a Kaner, or no Kaner? I'm beginning to think no Kaner is. He's not a player that plays through injury well.
  
• Wow, that Ryan Smyth goal was blown coverage of EPIC proportions. Long changes my ass, Eddie. A competent defenseman needs to account for all players and be sure he's the deepest man. The bench should have been shouting like a bunch of maniacs, as well.
  
• Kaner and Bolly on a 2-on-1, and guess who can't gather it in for a shot? If you had Bolland, you're wanted in the winners circle.
  

The Ugly

• I'd still like someone to explain to me why Jake Dowell was sitting in the press box in street clothes. One...Good...Reason, please. Why hasn't Invisi-Bolly been sat down for a game? Snake is playing better, and more consistent than Bolly.
  
• Duncan, Duncan, Duncan. WHY do we have to keep having these chats? FIRST, you oddly back hand pass the puck to Seabrook who is standing in your own crease. Of course that never makes it out of the zone. Then, you backhand it over the glass and take a bad penalty. After Toews then takes his bad high sticking penalty while killing your stupid penalty, you're down 5-on-3 with arguably two of your best penalty killers in the box. The Kings score on the Toews penalty, and guess where this all started? You guessed it, Norris Trophy winning D-Man.
  

Here are the video highlights for your viewing pleasure:

Read More

There's No "O" In Anaheim

"Really, guys, I don't know how I'm still out here either"

Game number one of 2011 and it's in sunny SoCal against the Ducks. The first period had plenty of action with each team putting up one goal. Anaheim put a bad coverage goal in for the only goal of the second, and the third was scoreless. This Toews injury is going to be THAT painful, I suppose. Good news is he's ahead of schedule and could be back against the Kings. Thank god!!! Another superstar at less than 100%. Now Kaner won't feel so lonely.

The Good

• Eddie O, "Gotta love the Hockey moms". Priceless!
  
• One Trick Bick continued his torrid scoring pace. Even though it wasn't a power play goal, it was only about 3 seconds after the PP was over, so in all reality, it was a PP goal. The Ducks couldn't get the puck out of their own end and it ended up in the back of their cage.
  
• Boss 81 is just that much better than every other player controlling the puck. He keeps it until he wants you to have it, no sooner.
  
• The fourth line really cycles well, just too bad that we hardly see them. I take that back. We saw Pick-To-Click Vik and Skillington, but Snake was banished to the bench for the third period.
  
• Corey Crawford was absolutely standing on his head, in the third period. It could have easily been 4-1. Nice to see CrawDaddy back in the cage. I'm officially on the Crawford Bandwagon.
  
• P2C-Vik and Skillington were the best forwards on the ice, period.
  

The Bad

• There is only person I'd want leading a 2-on-1 less than Invisi-Bolly, and his name is John Scott. The next time up the Ice, Hossa actually took it off Bolly's stick, like the neighborhood stud taking it away from the feeble little runt.
  
• The Ducks were peppering the net before they scored the first goal. Crawford was screened by about 4 people, as well. I'm sure this is why Q will take Hendry off defense, but it wasn't his fault at all.
  
• Ryan Johnson, Duncan Keith and Brent Seabrook got beat pretty badly on the second Ducks goal. How do you let TWO opposing players behind our top pairing? Fastest skater in the league, eh, Dunc? Corey Perry made him look like he was standing still.
  
• The following shift, 100 year old Teemu Selanne broke between the #2 and #7. It's going to be one of those games, isn't it?
  
• And two shifts later, Keith willingly just handed it over to a Ducks forward behind his own net. One of those games, indeed.
  
• Excuse me, Pat? Jake the Snake is not Pat Kane. Not...even...close. And at this point, Dowell has a better chance of putting the puck in the net. Well, that is, when he's not being benched for no reason...more on that later.
  
• Speaking of Pat Kane. Did he dress last night? Obviously not at 100%, I guess, and nice penalty on Selanne. Could have really iced the game on that mistake, but it wouldn't have mattered anyway.
  
• I'm not sure why I haven't noticed this before, but when Hammer tries to skate at top speed, his arms move faster than his legs.
  
• I know they put on a little pressure, but what did Skillington and Pick To Click Vik do to earn time with Kopecky? At least Jake the Snake is competent. Snake sits while Kopecky just sucks the life out of everyone around him.
  
• Quenneville is so confident in Sharpie at center that he sends Ryan Johnson out to take Sharpie's offensive zone faceoffs. That's what I call a confidence builder, and an act of desperation.
  

The Ugly

• Kopy, Kopy, Kopy. ANOTHER offensive zone penalty. C'mon now, this is really stupid. But then again, you're a stupid person. He's basically useless on the Powerplay, as well.
  
• The curious case of Keith and Seabrook could best be described as an "adventure". They were all over the place, and it was scary.
  
• I still don't get Ryan Johnson. Jeff Taffe and Ryan Potulny aren't better than him? Really? Because he is really not that good.
  
• Bench Jake the Snake, Quenneville? What are you out of your mind? Kane hasn't done shit for 3 games, and you still trot him out there shift after unproductive shift. I know you can't bench him, but playing him as much as Quenneville is, just isn't producing results.
  

I'm fed up, Here are the video highlights for your viewing pleasure:

Read More

Winter Classic Observations

First Period

• The Camera angles are fucking awful, who is producing? Ray Charles?
  
• The penalty in Crosby was not a penalty shot. He never had clear possession of the puck.
  
• First real Winter Classic fight, and it was a pretty damn good one.
  
• Varlamov's mask looked bad ass.
  
• Like the rest of his taste in equipment, Fleury's is pitifully ugly.
  
  
• Pierre McGuire is still the biggest douche in the NHL, and makes me want to vomit up my inner organs and jam rusty screwdrivers in my ears.
  

Second Period

• Ovie needs to just shoot on that breakaway
  
• Great save on one end turns into a goal on the other.
  
• Fleury got completely raped on that Caps goal. Nothing like being speared in the crotch with random sticks
  
• John Carlson is a little..."lacking" on D.
  
• Tyler Kennedy has been beaten about the face with an ugly stick. He looks like a pug.
  
• Nice wraparound Chimera. Excellent fancypants screw up.
  
• Fluery stickhandles like an old woman. You're no Marty Turco with the puck, dude, but then again Turco has been no Fleury in every other way.
  
• Holy shit that shootout between Bettis and Harris was embarrassing. I'd rather watch little kids do it. Those two goofballs don't give a shit.
  

Third Period Period

• Hockey Day in America from Millennium Park in Chicago? Interesting.
  
• Camera angles. FUCKING TERRIBLE!!!!!!
  
• Beautiful give-n-go with Fehr and Chimera.
  
• After watching that 24/7 thing on HBO, I anoint Fehr's wife SMOKING HOT!
  
• Hey Ovie, you can't makeout with the goalie. I know he's all french and romantic but FAIL!
  

Read More

Shark Attack

So, the game against San Jose marks the first game without Captain Serious. With Seabrook gaining the additional "A" and Jake Dowell taking center of the first line. The Hawks started well with a powerplay goal but gave up a bad one on a slow line change, and finished the first twenty minutes tied 1-1. The second period was a complete shit show for the first 19 minutes, but Troy Brouwer and Brian Campbell tied it up at 3's. They weren't so fortunate in the third, as the Sharks scored on the powerplay and finished the Hawks off with an empty net goal.

The Good

• One of the biggest bright spots this year is Jake the Snake Dowell. I'm glad to see him getting a chance to center the first line.
  
• The powerplay cashed in the first time they were out there, with Kopecky feeding a wide open Sharpie, who gave Niemi a little top cheese. Maybe a night of powerplay feasting? Not so much.
  
• Duncan Kieth was dominant in his own zone. Simply dominant. Just too bad there was such a suckfest around him. Everyone else around him looked like they'd never seen a puck before.
  
• Gotta love Brouwer's powerplay goal that was banked off Niemi's stick. That made me laugh like Deniro in Cape Fear.
  
• Soupy, Soupy, Soupy! Campbell bit the hand that use to feed him, with an ENORMOUS goal to end the second period. That's what this team needed going into the third, because they were stinking up the joint before that. Of course it was right back to
  

The Bad

• It was a matter of time before Turco really turned it over, and tonight was that night. He shot it right into the chest of the Shark's Ferriero, and the panic alarm went off. Luckily Duncs was prepared to bail him out, and did. I understand you're confident Marty, but there is such a thing as too confident. Take it down a notch.
  
• The Hawks played with fire and had a bad line change in which Scott Nichol took a pass in behind the defense and just put the shot through Turco. That's one Marty will want back.
  
• The Hawks were bending and finally broke on the 5-on-3. Turco didnt exactly put a stellar effort in on that one. You'd like to see him stay somewhat upright on that one, not flopping around like a fish. Ferriero was left with the entire top half of the net, and didn't miss it.
  
• On the third goal, Hammer wanted nothing to do with tying up Dany Heatley. Another Goal that the Twatter and Facebook dopes will blame on Marty. That, folks, was a defensive breakdown goal.
  
• San Jose goal number four was another powerplay goal against. The Hawks penalty kill is simply atrocious. AWFUL! After yet another bad penalty, Joe-ver Rated Thornton tipped a point shot past Turco. That was all the Sharks needed.
  

The Ugly

• Hey Tomokop? Another offensive zone penalty? Dude, WHAT THE FUCK? Nice turnover on the powerplay, too. You're just batting 1.000 aren't you? BRUTAL mistakes. Where does it start and where does it end? He can't win a faceoff. The emply net goal was solely his fault. When does this end? Every time I jot down something he screws up on, he does it again or something worse.
  
• Nick Boynton. NICK FUCKING BOYNTON!!! He takes a stupid ass offensive zone penalty, and the resulting powerplay has the puck ending up in the back of the net. WHY must we endure this shit? He's a blockhead, that's average at best, and he's making Jassen Cullimore look like Bobby Orr. Why would you blatantly slash the stick out of a guys hand like that? Brainless twit!
  

Here are the video highlights for your viewing pleasure:

Read More