Tell Us How You Really Feel, Marty.

Matt McClure of the Second City Hockey posted this up on his Facebook, and I couldn't pass it up. As much as I think Crawford deserves to be the starting netminder, I love Marty Turco's attitude and demeanor. This made me laugh out loud hysterically, because it was on national TV. STELLAR! Marty, I have to shake your hand someday, because clearly we both feel that Pierre McGuire is a witless windbag. Cheers to you, Marty Turco!!!!!!

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Day Off Blues Clues

You people are really going to be sick of me, but I have topics to discuss and time to discuss them. So, lets dive right in, shall we?

• I'm not sure where they got this, but a friend messaged me last night to tell me that the NHL network was reporting that Kaner will be out 4-6 weeks with an ankle issue. If it is anything like I think it might be, he's going to be tender and ineffective for longer than that. Now, I didn't have the wonders of a multimillion dollar training and rehab staff, but I had a similar injury and I wasn't even close to normal for at least 8 weeks, and I'm just a goalie. Anyway, it's clear Kaner is out for a while, Boss 81 is probably at least a week away from being rushed back too soon, and Pisani...is talent deficient. This morning Quenneville said Kaner will only be out for 3 weeks but I strongly believe he's being conservative to keep the media at bay. When all is said and done, don't be surprised to see him out for closer to the original reported time.
  
  
• The Hawks announced, apparently only to columnist Tim Sassone, that Morin will be back for the Wednesday game. Yeah, yeah, Salary cap, blabbity, blah, blah. For those of you hoping to see Kyle Beach anytime this year, you're high. He makes $250K more than Morin and they have to send HIM back to Rock-beria on off days to save some cabbage. Unless they drop some salary though trades, you will see Potulny, Pirri, Smith and/or Makarov before Kyle Beach steps on the ice at the United Center. Welcome to Hawk-onomics, folks, I'll be your instructor, Stan Bowman.
  
  
• The Second City Hockey/Committed Indian guys have touched on it. We don't really have the goalie controversy of last year, and quite frankly, this is how last year should have been handled, early on. The only problem was that they had to somehow justify almost $6 million of suck. It's all water under the bridge, because they won, but they are in a similar position this year and I feel Quenneville is handling it right. Stick with the hot hand, whoever that may be. I agree, completely, with the SCH/Committed Indian guys about the fact that the Hawks owe Marty Turco nothing. He practically begged to play here, and they needed an insurance policy, if Crawford wasn't ready. Well, Crawford IS ready and Turco has been average. Even on his bad days the Hawks seem to play better in front of Crawford, for whatever reason. It's about time we started getting use to Corey Crawford as our starting netminder, as he will be tomorrow night. Where is my #50 jersey?
  
  
  
• Today it was announced that prospects Jeremy Morin and Nick Leddy were named to preliminary roster for U.S. National Junior team. That will take them off our hands for a little bit. Should be interesting with Kaner out for a while, Hossa recovering, and Morin playing for the WJC. The options for goal scoring are getting thinner by the day. Get ready to have Tomas Kopecky and Troy Brouwer jammed down our throats, nightly. Just what we wanted for Christmas, Santa.
  
  
• If you don't want to weed through the drivel of this Adam Jahn's article, let me highlight a few points. He is suggesting a few options to alleviate the recent player losses. Shorten the Bench, Find some ripe players on the Rock-beria Icehogs bush, and finally, my FAVORITE; More Hendry and Big Show at wing. First of all, they have been playing with a short bench, BECAUSE Big Show only makes appearances for 300 seconds a game and Skille hasn't exactly been leaving a cold seat on the bench, himself. Second, The Icehogs aren't exactly tearing up the AHL (9-11-3), and they top prospects aren't really lighting the lamp either. Defenseman Brian Connolly is leading the team in scoring with 16 points and Ryan Potulny is behind him with 13. Lastly, more Big Show and Hendry? That's tremendous a waste of my Oxygen, and we all know Quenneville drowned Hendry and buried him in a vacant west side lot. Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids.
  
  
• At this morning's practice the team was skating with only three lines. Skillington, Pick-To-Click Vik and Toews; TomoKop, Shooter and Jake the Snake; and Brouwer, Bickell, and Invisi-Bolland. Of course, this is all without Morin, Hossa, Pisani, or Kane. This makes me wonder though...since Morin can't practice with the team, does this mean he's in protective custody at some undisclosed location, or does he really have to drive all the way out to Rock-beria to report? I hope he's looking to invest in one of those new hybrid cars because the gas alone is going to bankrupt him. Junkfood for thought.
  

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Carnac the Magnificent : 2010/11 Blackhawks Predictions

The day of reckoning is finally here. Opening night in the NHL, and the first Blackhawks title defense in almost half a century. All summer long, whether it was the dopey bandwagon fans or the idiot interweb wise asses with their "haterade", not many people have given the team a chance to repeat. Lets face it, repeating in ANY sport is difficult, and with roughly 30% of your roster playing elsewhere this year, it will be a battle. Since every other person with a keyboard or a 3G phone is giving their prediction, I figure that I'd be the odd asshole out, if I didn't give mine. So without further ado, drumroll please...

The answer is: 45-28-9...45-28-9
The question is: What will the Blackhawks record be on April 11th, 2011?
The view is that the team had an excellent year last year, but there will be many more periods of struggling this season. They open up without the person that was their best powerplay quarterback, Brian Campbell. There will be chemistry problems, and more lineup shifting than we're accustomed to, but Quenneville will find a way to make things work. Making the playoffs is the goal, and they will do that easily.

The answer is: 69 minus 10...69 minus 10
The question is: How many games will Marty Turco start?
The view is that Turco is the old, and by old I do still mean younger than me, mule that "Q" will ride into the sunset. Age or injuries aside, that's what Marty the Midget is use to. He took his benching last year in stride, but he knew he was leaving. He didn't sign a one year deal at a highly discounted rate here to watch Corey Crawford eat up minutes, and because Turco the anti-Huet, Crawford will be required to play less.

The answer is: 33-20-6...33...20...and 6
The question is: What will Marty the Midget's record, at season's end?
The view is that Marty is the man, and there is no need to crowbar Corey Crawford in there. Marty will be fine, and he will set the regular season assist record for Blackhawks goaltenders.

The answer is: Shooter's McDreamy understudy, The Swedish Rocket
The question is: Who is Carnac's pick as biggest surprise Blackhawk player?
The view is that there is a new gunfighter in town ,and his name is Victor Stalberg. By gunfighter I don't mean sniper, although I have a sneaking suspicion that he'll score quite a few. I mean resident panty dropper. Once the puck bunnies get a load of this guy, Sharpie's woman can finally breathe a sigh of relief. On the ice, he has all the tools to be a solid power forward, he just needs to apply himself. He had a slow preseason, but showed flashes of blazing speed and soft hands. I'm sticking by my pre-preseason pick.

The answer is: Big Hoss, and Patrick the Pimp
The question is: Who will lead the team in goals, and points?
The view is that Hossa has looked, far and away, the most dominant Hawk since February of last season. When he has the puck, it doesn't leave his stick until he wants someone else to have it. Chuck Norris will be wearing a Marian Hossa costume for Halloween. The Hoss, not to be confused with the Hoff, will probably eclipse 40 goals, and could net somewhere in the high 40's. Not a bold prediction, I know, but a safe one. Kaner will lead the team in points, because he is simply a point producing dynamo, as well as a drunken bar slut magnet. The only thing that will slow him down is the women hanging on his pant legs. When Kaner is done beating the women off with his Stanley Cup ring wearing pimp hand, he'll be a scoring and passing machine. Look for 35 goals and 60 assists. He's improved his goal scoring every year, and not even hot tubs full of champagne and Wrigleyville hussies can slow him down.

The answer is: Drew "Dont You" Doughty
The question is: Who will unseat Keith as the Norris Trophy winner?
The view is that the NHL has been hyping Doughty since the day after Keith won it. If it were up to me, Keith would get a 5 year lease of it, but the league is pushing younger stars to bring in the youth. It's quite amusing that at 27, anyone would be considered old, but Keith will continue to be a candidate for years to come. Keith would gladly let Doughty borrow it for a year while he wins another cup, I'm sure.

The answer is: Vancouver CaFucks
The question is: Who is Carnac's pick to win the Western Conference?
The view is that I hope I'm proven wrong, but I see the CaFucks finally making a move to the next level. They stocked up on defense and Luongo doesn't have to deal with the Big Fluff this year. Tomax and Xamot are a fierce ginger duo with some crazy telepathic powers. The LA Kings are also going to make a run, but they are a few years away. The popular pick is Detoilet, but they are another year older, and more fragile, and I refuse to believe that they defy nature. I hope I'm proven wrong, and the Hawks repeat, but it's a competitive league.

The answer is: Philly Cheesesteaks and Pittsburgh Black Lung
The question is: What teams will be teams to beat in the East?
The view is that the two Pennsylvania teams are powerhouses. Philly's defense got BETTER, if you can imagine that, and Pittsburgh is an offensive juggernaut. If Philly can figure out their goaltending sitiation, they'll be just fine. War-shing-ton and Bawston will have something to say, but the road to the Eastern Conf is Route 76, and it goes from Philly to Pittsburgh. With the Capitals goaltending situation, they are better playing without one and putting an extra defenseman out there. Boston has some promise, and a talented young goalie, but I still don't see a great deal of offense from them.


There you have it. Those are my random predictions. If anyone wants my opinion on other subjects, feel free to email them to me at PuckinHostile@gmail.com.

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Double Dose of the Evil Red Army, and Musical Chairs

On the next "Bromance"

The first really eventful week came to a close Sunday, and the Hawks came out of it 1-2 and quite a bit lighter. They made several roster moves and split a Friday/Saturday home and home series with the Ivan Dragos to our Rocky, the Dead Wings.

-On Friday, the Hawks assigned, Forward David Gilbert to the Acadie-Bathurst Titans (QMJHL). No huge surprise, so I'm not going to spend much time on it, but He looked good in the rookie tournament, and was pretty much invisible in the game Wednesday.

-Friday's game against the Wings was a joke. Bolland, Kopecky, Brouwer, and Campbell were the only real noteworthy players in the lineup. Poor Corey Crawford, really didn't have much support. Most of the goals were poorly covered rebounds, and sketchy defense. Blah...blah, blah, blah.

-Saturday, the Hawks announced a flurry of roster cuts. Forwards Brandon Bollig, Rob Klinkhammer and Brandon Pirri, and defensemen Jonathan Carlsson, Simon Danis-Pepin, Ryan Stanton and Ivan Vishnevskiy were sent to Rockford. They also released forwards Rastislav Pavlikovsky and Nick Tarnasky, and defenseman Wade Brookbank. None of these moves surprise me, and the only one that was remotely noticeable was Pirri. He had a few nice plays, but he clearly needs some seasoning in Rockford.


Mr. Jack Skille
-Saturday night, the bottom half of the home and home series was back at the UC. Obviously, Quenneville rested up the big boys for the home preseason debut, and the Wings did the opposite. I really didn't see a lot of the game, but some things caught my eye. Turco's outlet pass to Kane, which set up a goal, was excellent; both from Turco's end and from Kane's. Turco noticed Detoilet changing lines and launched an outlet pass from the crease to the far blue line, where Kane was waiting. Kane was able to smoothly trap the pass and worked it in the zone to Pisani who fed Keith for a perfect one timer. Something, Huet or Niemi couldn't dream of. Jack Skille was actually, wait for it; NOTICEABLE. Now, keep in mind, we're talking about a half ass Wings lineup, but he had a goal, and assist and 4 shots on net. I didn't find myself asking, "Who is that number 20, out there?". I realize big bad John Scott made his debut, but I wasn't able to pay enough attention to the game to recall anything of substance in his play. Hossa quietly had a 2 point night and Fernando Pisani had a 2 assist night. Let's not all start planning the June Stanley Cup parade, but the team looks well, with most of the regulars playing. Turco played the whole game and looked pretty good. A few people have mentioned how small he looks, and I agree. He's probably closer to 5'9" than 5'11", but I don't care. He's aggressive, and athletic. Those two things, alone, will stick in the back of opposing players minds. Past goalies almost looked frightened by the thought of playing the puck, much less, turning it around and unleashing a 75' pass on the tape of a teammate. He may have his soft moments, but plays like that one make me smile and give me the "warm fuzzies", in the cockles of my heart. Well played, Sir!

-Sunday the Hawks assigned forward Chris DiDomenico and defenseman Shawn Lalonde to Rockford. Again, no big surprise. Lalonde is a player the Hawks are very high on, but needs a little AHL flavor added to his game. Connelly and Leddy have been much more consistent. The person that is SHOCKINGLY still on the roster, is Jassen Cullimore. There is no way that guy makes the this team. He has the worst qualities of Matt Walker and Brent Sopel, all rolled into one big 37 year old sloth. My prediction is that Leddy and Cullimore get moved to Rockford. Connolly is a 50/50 bet, but I just don't see him sticking at only 5'10" (probably really 5'8") 167lbs. that would leave Keith, Seabrook, Campbell, Hjalmarsson, Boynton, Hendry, and Scott. If there are any injuries or trades, Connelly or Leddy are the guys that are coming up. With Connelly making almost half what Leddy is, you can bet that Connelly will be the first guy brought up, if needed.

-Lastly, the phenom that is Jeremy Morin just keeps chugging along. Everybody loves him, and he's exciting. In fact, he's exciting enough to earn that #27 on his back that another legendary Jeremy once wore, but I still don't see him sticking right away. He's only 19, and right out of the juniors. Facing top 6 defensemen in the NHL every night will be a lot different than the hacks he's seen in the preseason. Don't get me wrong, I think he's going to be a star for this team in the very near future, but where does he play? 3rd or 4th line? That's a complete waste of his talent and skillset. He's a top 6 player, and needs powerplay time. Send him to Rockford, let him absolutely dominate the AHL competition, build his confidence, and work him in as needed. Rushing him up to waste away at the bottom of the lineup is just foolish. It's very nice to have the problem of too much talent. I still stand by my prediction that Makarov wins a spot over Morin, even though I think Morin is going to be a better player.

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Turco Accepts the Keys to the 2010 Stanley Cup Defense

Marty Turco
I’m not a betting man, but I’m going to ride this hot streak I’ve been on. Monday the Hawks announced that they signed 3 time former All-star Marty Turco to a one year deal worth a reported $1.3 Million. Yes, I just said only $1.3 Million. The Hawks just signed a $5.4 Million, 3 time all-star for a mere $1.3 million. In doing so, the Hawks let Antti Niemi try his luck in the free agent market. The only words I have for that are "GOOD LUCK", because he will need it. Based on the fact that goalies have been signed for bargain basement prices all summer, I cannot believe that someone will sign him for a long term deal at $2.75 million a year. I’ve said over and over that I feel this is a very smart move by the Hawks. In fact, based on the current roster situations, he’s not even guaranteed a starting job somewhere else. He went from the starting goalie on the Stanley Cup champs to fighting for a starting job on some other team. I’m not a sports agent, but I’d say that’s a considerable step down.


I don’t want to take away from Antti Niemi, because he HELPED bring the Hawks a Stanley Cup, but lets look at the facts in this situation. He’s not even close to the only reason the Stanley Cup is in Chicago. Before last season, Niemi was an undrafted free agent signing that had ONLY played in the AHL, where he ONLY went 18-14-3 with a GSS of 2.43. He barely beat out Corey Crawford for the backup position and remained there for a good portion of the season. He only won the starting position when Cristobal Huet completely shit the bed in late February. During the regular season he only faced 21.8 shots a game, and in the playoffs he faced 26.7 and his GAA went up to 2.63. He’s played a total of 64 NHL games.
Turco, on the other hand, has an average of 29 wins a year (262 total). His GAA is 2.31 and he’s faced an average of 22.6 shots a game over his career. He’s been the starting keeper of a team for nearly 10 years. He’s a superior puckhandling goalie, and a great locker room presence. He’s never had a defense in front of him like the one the Hawks currently have. You can chirp all you want about how he’s a playoff choke artist, and all that other horseshit. He’s never had a team in front of him with offense and defense like this. Niemi rarely ever had to stand on his head and take over a game and neither will Turco. He’s a positive guy that keeps his teammates loose. He’s not a pouting Frenchman who has such a fragile ego that he can’t keep a job anywhere he goes, and he’s not a green, sophomore goalie that had the benefit of a strong defense in front of him. I love what I’ve heard and read of Turco. He took a huge pay cut just to come to Chicago. In the day and age of pompous egotistical athletes that expect huge contracts before they ever step on the field/ice/court, and for fluke years, this is refreshing. So, hate him all you’d like, but he has showed the maturity and character that most professional athletes lack.


Detroit has a new man in charge
Marty Turco will do just fine here in Chicago, so all of you haters and your “Enjoy your cup now because you’ll never defend it” can kiss my ass. This is a win/win situation for Stan Bowman. They get a proven goalie at a bargain price, and have leftover cash to fill out their roster. Some of these people act like the Hawks wanted this situation. Their hand was forced because of some bad decisions by previous members of the staff. Until the cup is in another city you can yap all you want; especially in Detoilet. The days of Detroit mowing the conference down are over, "Hockeytown". You’re older, and more fragile, so that "we had a lot of injuries" excuse doesn’t fly any longer. Every team has injuries, and every team has to learn to overcome them. You people can jump on the Chicago hating bandwagon just like everyone else outside of Chicago. If winning means everyone hates the Hawks, I hope every person outside of IL hates the Hawks. I’ll be the first to admit that maybe the Hawks won’t repeat. It’s a VERY hard thing to do in ANY pro sport, and the odds are against them without this salary capocalypse, but I will promise you one thing; The Chicago Blackhawks will contend for the Stanley Cup and will for quite a few more years to come.


In the shadows of the Turco situation the Hawks signed a few pretty obscure minor league players, some of whom I’d reported earlier. Evan Brophey, Jassen Cullimore, Nathan Davis, Hugh Jessiman, Hannu Toivonen, and Igor Makarov were announced this week. None of these guys are going to see significant time with the team, so don’t put too much effort into remembering their names. The biggest name is Jessiman, because he’s a former 1st round draft pick of the NY Rangers in ’03, and obviously hasn’t panned out.

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Man, I'm Tired of Being Right

Not that I predicted that the world would end in 2012, but it’s August 2nd and the Hawks are right where I said they would be. Sometime Saturday, the arbitrator awarded Antti Niemi $2.75 Million, which is at least half a million more then they want to pay him. I’m sure more than a few of you are mumbling to yourselves, “What’s $500,000, when we have salary cap that is $56.8 Million?” and I answer…again. The Hawks are currently over the salary cap by $3,003,256 with 1 forward, 1 or 2 defensemen, and 2 goalies left to decide on. As I’ve pointed out, that salary cap number includes Cristobal Huet’s $5.625 Million that the Hawks have no choice but to unload. Once Huet is removed, they have about $2.6 Million to play with. You can see where I’m going with this, as the ruling would put the Hawks back up over the cap by roughly $15,000 with a minimum 3 players left to fill the roster. The Hawks really have no choice, but to let Niemi go, but there are reasonable options that I’ll point out later.


NOW, Anyone who starts with the “wa, wa, wa, they are breaking up the team in some diabolical plan to make the city of Chicago suck again” needs to be stabbed in the thorax with a knitting needle, because you’re a complete asshole with no concept of the business side of sports. It’s a moronic theory and no team would do that. All the players that were sent away were overpaid or role players that were expendable. This is not entirely the management’s fault, and this is why. First of all, Jack Skille, Bryan Bickell, Jake Dowell, and John Scott are probably underpaid. You have Toews, Kane, Hossa, Keith, Kopecky, Brouwer, Stalberg, and Seabrook that are pretty much paid fair market value. There is Sharp, Bolland, and Hjalmarsson that are slightly overpaid, and there are Campbell and Huet that are just retardedly overpaid. They are going to make the Huet abomination go away, and there isn’t much that can be done with Campbell. In all honesty, at the time, Campbell was a “must sign” player, and to get him, the team needed to overpay. You can’t fault them for being aggressive, and it paid off with a Stanley Cup. I fully blame the fact that they had to overpay for some of these players on the one and only rotting corpse, Bill Wirtz. He drove the value and reputation of the team down to the depths of embarrassing hilarity. Think about the scenario that he put the Hawks in; you’re a big money player that has a chance to play for a proven winner or cup contender for average market value or the lowly Hawks of 4 years ago, that had been the joke of the league because of the drunken, senile old curmudgeon, for roughly 10 years. Of course the Hawks would have to overpay. Dale Tallon really made a mess of the unrestricted free agent tenders last year, and the Huet thing is a big mess, but he accomplished quite a few more good things that brought a Stanley Cup to Chicago. So, If things were a little less screwy we might have about an extra $3.5 million to play with, but it’s not to be. At least we’re not paying Rick Dipietro $4.5 million a year until the 2020-2021 season, right?


Marty Turco
Now on to the options. I mentioned last week that Marty Turco was the best replacement option on the market for Niemi, and it’s looking like the Hawks think so, too. Early reports have the Hawks negotiating with Turco as recent as last night, and rumors have the one year deal worth about $1.75 Million. I realize Turco is 8 years older than Niemi, but this makes sense. The Hawks know what they are getting with Turco. Niemi may become a superstar, or he may slide right into Averageville. Don’t forget that the Hawks probably had the best top 4 defensemen in the league. Let Niemi try for a “no-no” playing in Edmonton, or for the Islanders. The bottom line is that he had a good playoff but could not win the starting job, outright, until Huet folded like a soggy pita. The outside option, which might drive me straight to the looney bin, is Jose Theodore. No one with any brains wants to see the guy that was chased out of Montreal by Cristobal Huet, and chased out of Washington by a marginal goalie named Semyon Varlomov. As I said the other day, I’d rather struggle with Corey Crawford and Hannu Toivonen in net. I'm just hoping we can see a sign and trade scenario with Niemi, so maybe we can get something in return.

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