Monday, March 27, 2017

Blackhawks at Tampa Bay
5-4 OT Loss Recap

"Disgustipated"

by Gatekeeper


I think we can all agree that Saturday night's game was forgettable? The final two periods of that game, to be more precise. As always, the meatballs poked their heads out from the rocks they have been hiding under for most of the last 2 months, which was fully expected. Coach Joel Quenneville hinted at a few changed for Monday night's game, but we never really know what will happen until the warmups. Ryan Hartman was hinted at, as the Coach Wizzo healthy scratch-a-palooza. Scott Darling made the start in net, which was scheduled, based on the tight schedule. Not like they could possibly play any better than they did in Sunrise this weekend.

The opening period was the polar opposite of Saturday night. Action was fast and furious as the teams combined for four goals between them, on 20 shots (11-9) in favor of the Blackhawks. That is how you rebound from a total ass whipping, well, if you can maintain that pressure for the final forty minutes. Two sloppy penalties left a bit to be desired, but the Hawks made some progress.

Not really sure what Jon Cooper was thinking but he started Andrei Vasilevskiy in the second period, but I suppose it worked out alright. Why go back to the well, though? The Blackhawks did put themselves up 4-1 but it was all downhill after that. The Bolts scored three straight goals, and had the Blackhawks on their heels for the entire last 2/3rds of the period, where the Lightning out shot the Hawks 14-10, but it might as well have been 14-2 the way the ice was slanted.

As full of scoring as the opening two period were, the third was much less eventful. In fact, there were no goals either way, which meant that each team was going to grab a standings point and go to overtime. The Hawks actually made a good showing in the period, out shooting the Bolts 10-3. I guess if you don't blow a three goal lead, you don;t need third period goals, but I digress.

Overtime action, at least in the beginning, was heavily in favor of the Lightning, and their fourth shot of the period ended up the game winner. I guess a single point isn't a total loss, but this was an opportunity blown.

The Good
  • Just under 1:30 in, the Blackhawks already had more success than they did the entire previous game. Artemi Panarin found a blocked Tanner Kero shot on his blade and one timed it on Andrei Vasilevskiy. Vasilevskiy made the initial stop, but it squirted through him and dribbled just over the goal line.
  • Patrick Kane grabbed back the lead for the Blackhawks just moments after the Ondrej Palat goal. Kane was in almost the identical position as Panarin was for his goal, but this time Kane beat Vasilevskiy clean to the stick side, through a Lightning screen.
  • With Tomas Jurco in the lineup, he paid dividends right away. Jurco got his first goal of the year with just over six minutes remaining in the first period. Nick Schmaltz let a long shot go and Jurco chipped the rebound past Vasilevskiy for a 3-1 Blackhawks lead. This would be the end on Vasilevskiy's first period. In came Peter Budaj.
  • #DickFuckingPanik put the Blackhawks up 4-1 about halfway through the second period, which was his 21st of the year. The Lightning couldn't get the puck out of the zone and Panik drove to the net poking his own rebound past Vasilevskiy. Panik's 41 points are 13 more than Andrew Shaw at a fraction of the price. It cannot go without mentioning that Panik also has half the penalty minutes.
  • The speed that Jonathan Drouin skates around with in the 3-vs-3 overtime is terrifying. There was one point that I thought he was going to repeatedly skate around the Hawks zone with not a single player able to get a hand or stick on him, until they were all too tired to chase him anymore.
  • I'm not exactly keen on the details of the mask, but the primary black colors on Scott Darling's mask are sexy.

The Bad
  • It took the Lightning roughly seven seconds into their first powerplay, with some help from a lost Blackhawks faceoff, for them to tie the game about halfway through the first period. The powerplay was set up by a bad Brent Seabrook delay of game penalty, that resulted in Ondrej Palat tipping a long Victor Hedman clapper past Scott Darling
  • About two minutes after the Panik goal, Jonathan Drouin tipped an Alex Killorn shot that pinballed past Scott Darling to cut the Blackhawks lead back down to two goals.
  • Anton Stralman shaved the Blackhawks lead back down to one goal just about a minutes after the Drouin goal. At this point, Scott Darling was all over the fucking place. He was over sliding and forcing himself to make much more difficult stops than he needed to. This would have been a great time for a timeout to calm down their goaltender, as well as their defense, but Quenneville was fine watching his goalie flounder around.
  • The next meatball savior, John Hayden played on the forth line all night and was only mentioned a couple of times. It's safe to say that Space Shuttle Hayden has safely landed back down on earth. Healthy scratchville, population him, isn't too far in the future, like I predicted.

The Ugly
  • The Bolts' Brayden Point took a high clearing shot from Anton Stralman right in the side of the melon, while killing an early second period penalty, but was able to continue. Those are scary plays, for sure.
  • To complete the collapse, the Blackhawks took their second delay of game penalty, late in the second period, where they also gave up their second powerplay goal of the game. Nothing special about this one, as Jonathan Drouin blew a long clapper through an Ondrej Palat screen and past Scott Darling. There was still twenty three minutes left to play and EIGHT damn goals had been scored.
  • The Blackhawks Shitshow Petroleum powerplay was, as the name indicates, useless. They went 0-3 while the Bolts went 2-3. That's your game, folks.
  • The anarchy that is 3-vs-3 overtime ended up with the Blackhawks, first of all, not getting the puck over the Bolts blue line and, secondly, getting caught in a slow lazy change. Duncan Keith was slow getting off the ice, which kept Trevor van Riemsdyk from getting back to help Darling but this would have been a non-factor if Artemi Panarin would have been able to get the puck into the offensive zone. Patrick Kane was cheating and off to the races as well, so this left Yanni Gourde a break-a-way, where he beat Scott Darling for the game winner.
  • In the third period, the Trevor van Riemsdyk PR crew was in full lamentable form. Edzo had to point out that van Riemsdyk looked over his shoulder before he ate the puck behind his own net before his defensive partner had to come bail him out. This horseshit is so egregiously bad that is makes me want to vomit. How many player get this kind of unwarranted "spit-on-the-palm" hand job session?

The #Fatrick Stankus Fatsy Stats
  • Did I mention I was filling in for #Fatrick tonight?

The Lineblender
Left Wing - Center - Right Wing
Nick Schmaltz - Jonathan Toews - Richard Panik
Artemi Panarin - Tanner Kero - Patrick Kane
Tomas Jurco - Marcus Kruger - Marian Hossa
John Hayden - Andrew Desjardins - Jordin Tootoo

Duncan Keith - Niklas Hjalmarsson
Johnny Oduya - Brent Seabrook
Brian Campbell - Trevor van Riemsdyk

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