Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Blackhawks vs Flyers
7-4 Win Recap

"Seventh Son of a Seventh Son"

by Gatekeeper


With the weekend #PanikAttack over, it was time to come back down to earth, Tuesday night. The Blackhawks welcomed the Flyers from that always fair and rational city of Philly. Coming into this contest, the Blackhawks were a very mediocre 1-2-0 thanks to some growing pains. The problem is that the kids weren't the ones really struggling for this team, it was the veterans. Richard Panik lead the team and was tied for the NHL lead with 4 goals, as well as 5th in the lead in points with 5, coming into the game. Jonathan Toews, Patrick Kane, Marian Hossa, and Artemi Panarin had a combined zero goals and 6 points. This is a problem. We all figured that the big names would be the ones coming off the World Cup of Hockey hitting the ground running at full speed and carrying the team, but we couldn't have been more wrong. Alas, this is only 3 games, but some of these big names need to start doing a little more scoring and less fighting ballbag opponents. Is that too much to ask? They have a midget wearing number 22 that can eat fists and sit out for 5 minutes at a crack, or for the entire game for all I care. Knock off the bullshit shenanigans, El Capitan.

Speaking of shenanigans, there were many empty seats in the United Center due to some fucking baseball game that wasn't a clinching or World Series game. Whatever.


Good thing for those that actually showed up in person for this game, the Blackhawks took a quick 1-0 lead and seemed like they were not going to look back. When the clock reached zeros, heading into the first intermission, the Blackhawks were sitting pretty with a comfortable 3-0 lead. The shots on net were actually fairly close, even though the Blackhawks had a slight 11-8 advantage. Powerplays were also even, with each team getting awarded one. The Hawks 3rd goal was on their lone powerplay.

The second period wasn't quite as eventful, but the one event which was most interesting to Blackhawks fans was Marian Hossa's 500th goal. Hossa was the 7th player to get his 500th as a Blackhawk, hence the title. While Cubs fans were whining and pouting about the Dodgers thoroughly kicking their ass, a beloved Blackhawks player was collecting a career milestone. The Blackhawks still held the shot advantage at 22-18, out shooting the Flyers 11-10 in the second. The only bad part of the period was the Philly powerplay goal. The penalty kill took yet another hit.

The Blackhawks third period could best be described as nauseous. The Hawks blew their lead by giving up 3 goals in roughly three minutes, and it looked like the Cubbie faithful were going to be the only red assed fans in Chicago this night. It kind of felt like the Hawks were going to completely choke when all of a sudden they opened that fresh wound right back up, and performed open heart surgery on the Flyers. Three Blackhawks goals in the final ten minutes were more than enough to come away with a big 7-4 win. Just ask Artem Anisimov what he thought of the win and the young rookie defensemen on the team, would you Jammer?:


The Good
  • Fifty six seconds into the game a really nice, and patient, Artem Anisimov rush up the ice turned into a Patrick Kane goal. Anisimov pulled a Maverick on a defender and the defender flew right by. He sized up Michal Neuvirth, but the Flyer goaler made the save with the puck squirting right by the left post. Patrick Kane picked up the loose puck and his wrap around attempt went off Neuvirth's skate and into the net.
  • With two and a half minutes left in the first period, Flyers rookie defenseman Ivan Provorov picked up a puck at his own blue line and blew a Michelin, ending up on his can. The Moose on the Loose, Dennis Rasmussen, picked up the puck with a clean path to the net. Rasmussen made a nice backhand move and then went 5-hole on Neuvirth to give the Blackhawks a 2-0 lead.
  • Just thirty three seconds after the Rasmussen goal, Shayne Gostisbehere took a penalty for closing his hand on the puck, and the Blackhawks took advantage. The Hawks wasted little time, specifically thirteen seconds, scoring on the resulting powerplay. Brent Seabrook located Artemi Panarin completely across the ice with his stick cocked and hit him for a one timer past Neuvirth, and a Blackhawks 3-0 lead.
  • Five minutes into the second period Marian Hossa cut up the right side of the ice, on the powerplay, and beat Michal Neuvirth for his 500th career goal. I have no idea what the hell Neuvirth was doing on the play, but he gave Hossa far too much net from that angle. Either way, Hossa got the 500th monkey off his back. I'm so glad it wasn't some shitty open net goal, like they tried to do the other night. Great moment for a great guy.


  • After blowing their 4-0 lead, the Blackhawks grabbed the lead back courtesy of the #AK72 line. Claude Giroux gave the puck up in the neutral zone, and the play turned into a Kane-to-Panarin-to-Anisimov goal just seconds later.
  • With just under four minutes remaining in the game, the Flyers Provorov made another rookie mistake turning the puck over to Patrick Kane. Kane led a 2-on-1 with Artemi Panarin, and Steve Mason never stood chance. Kane floated a pass into Panarin's wheelhouse, and Panarin made absolutely no mistaken with another one timer.
  • I have to admit that I really like Michal Neuvirth. He has never really had a chance with a quality defense in front of him, and has carried the Flyers to wins, more than a few times. While Mason is also part of the "Wrong Handed Goalie Club", I have never been a huge fan. Of course this would be the game that Neuvirth gets pulled.

The Bad
  • A late second period Patrick Kane penalty, ended up turning into a Matt Read powerplay goal. Jake Voracek actually messed up and missed the net but the puck caromed behind the net and came out on the other side. Matt Read had gaping net, and did not miss.

The Ugly
  • Provorov eating shit and handing Rasmussen a goal was pretty comical. Welcome to the show, kid.
  • Thirty seven seconds into the third period, and Matt Read cut the Blackhawks lead to 2 goals. Read planted his ass on the back side as Claude Giroux looked to go behind the net. Giroux dumped the puck to Read, who was able to put it over Crawford, but the Blackhawks were still up 4-2 right? No problem, right?
  • A minute and seventeen seconds after the second Read goal, Sean Couturier made a nice move on Crawford and cut the Blackhawks lead to just one goal. Queue a timeout by Dr. Lineblender.
  • That timeout did little to stop the Flyers momentum, after a Michal Kempny high sticking penalty just about two minutes after the Couturier goal. Wayne Simmonds was the game tying goal scorer, and we back to even. Brutal series of goals against for the Blackhawks.
  • After Hossa scored his 500th goal, he was hurt blocking a shot and wasn't able to finish the game.
  • The Blackhawks penalty kill was, and continues to be, a flaming bag of dog shit.

The #Fatrick Stankus Fatsy Stats
  • The #AK72 line had a helluva night, potting 4 of the 7 goals. Not only that, but their overall CORSI percentages all between 60% and 69%.
  • Jonathan Toews, #DickFuckingPanik and Tyler Motte, well, not so much. They were the worst on the team, all in the low 40s.
  • Oddly enough, Marian Hossa was the team worst CORSI at 23%

The Lineblender
Left Wing - Center - Right Wing
Motte - Toews - Panik
Panarin - Anisimov - Kane
Hinostroza - Schmaltz - Hossa
Rasmussen - Kruger - Tootoo

Hjalmarsson - Keith
Kempny - Seabrook
Forsling - Campbell